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19 year old female just diagnosed with autism

Tia

Hi everyone,

I'm Tia and I've just joined this society as I've just only recently been diagnosed with autism hours before writing this. Just genuinely shocked right now at the diagnosis I mean I always knew there was something quite different about me as I have social anxiety and struggle in lots of social situations, at first I thought I was just shy and this problem or shyness would go away with time but unfortunately it became worse to the point where I would feel sick to my stomach and overthink to the point that I would just want to cry whether it was at a big family gathering or with strangers in a crowded place. It was when at a family gathering I couldn't hold the tears in and just burst out crying in front of everyone and panicking about how many people were there and wanting to just leave, I realised that maybe there was something more to this problem and I told my mum that I wanted proper help. I had a few therapy sessions last year but none of them helped as I hate talking about my feelings and I feel like the therapists didn't suit me. This week I had a psychological assessment where I answered a bunch of questions and the psychologist said some of my answers ticked some of the autism symptoms so booked me for an autism assessment. Then today I had my assessment again I had to answer some questions and separately my mom had to answer some questions with the result being a positive diagnosis. Hearing that I had autism made me sort of relieved like I finally know why I am the way I am but I also felt shocked I mean why was this not found earlier when I was younger. I am just so generally overwhelmed and don't what to do now that I have autism, I found this site when I was researching about autism and decided to start a discussion in hopes of any help which would be appreciated thank you.

  • Tia said:
    Hearing that I had autism made me sort of relieved like I finally know why I am the way I am but I also felt shocked I mean why was this not found earlier when I was younger. I am just so generally overwhelmed and don't what to do now that I have autism

    Hi Tia - congratulations on your diagnosis and welcome to the community!

    It's great that you're already feeling some benefit from your diagnosis. During the period following a diagnosis it can be common to experience emotional dysregulation - so please don't worry, this is normal! This can include working through a phase where we experience (backward-focused) anger, frustration, grieving and more.

    The NAS has a great set of articles focused around diagnosis, including one covering how you might feel during the subsequent days / weeks / months - you might find them of interest and/or helpful:

    NAS - How you might feel after a diagnosis

    NAS - Other advice covering post-diagnosis

    In terms of what - specifically - to do next, my advice at this point (ie so soon after your diagnosis yesterday) would be to try and give yourself some time and breathing space to process and absorb everything that you've been through, and let your feelings settle down.

    For me, as for many others here, my diagnosis turned out to be much more of the start of a new journey, rather than a solution-rich conclusion.  

    Tia said:
    I had a few therapy sessions last year but none of them helped as I hate talking about my feelings and I feel like the therapists didn't suit me.

    Therapy is often also recommended after a diagnosis. Before revisiting the idea, you might find it helpful to borrow or buy this book, which includes discussion of various types of therapy and counselling, together with advice on choosing the right therapist or counsellor - all from an autistic person's viewpoint. Several of us here have found it very helpful, myself included:

    The Autistic Survival Guide to Therapy

  • Hi Tia and welcome.

    You're not alone - we have all felt like you do when finding out we're on the spectrum. I had no idea until I was in my fifties, after decades of what I now see was me trying to fit in and be "normal".

    It might help if you can come to terms with the fact that sensory overload causes anxiety and anxiety causes the loss of emotional control. I have always cried a lot and I hate that loss.of control, but I know now why it happens.

    It can help to share your experiences and read about others on this forum.