It's the label and stigma that is disabling

I relate highly to this post as someone recently diagnosed at 19 I almost feel like no one wants to talk about it. The reactions from my family are ‘oh ok’ quickly moving on and not wanting to talk about it almost hiding it in a secretive way. I feel personally very open about it and I don’t want to hide it but I feel these reactions have stunted that. I feel as if I’m hiding a huge part of me because people have so much stigma around it. 

That's well and good. Me too. But, you don't run into difficulties interacting with others?

Society is amorphous. Society is dynamic.

You can be part of that dynamic, or go along with what ever it wants.

Up to you alone.

For me, celebrating life and what I can do, is easier and takes a lot less mental gymnastics.

Im pleased for you that your experience is so positive. But I definitely think you are the exception.

My point isnt necessarily how I feel about myself, or my abilities, it's about how I am able to identify in society.

I have just been me for 40 years with a good number of struggles. Aged 40 those struggles were validated. Great!

But along with that clarity came a label, a label I'd always assumed was for other people who were noticably disabled. So I was now at a cross roads; do I tell people I am this label, or do I just tell people as and when I need some adjustments made?

I have mostly chosen the latter, and when I've chosen the former I've noticed the prejudice take hold in the moment, even from people who work in support of those with differences. I find that quite shocking.

So for now, I feel society isn't ready, nor am I ready, for a stigma to be attached to my identity. I am not masking as much as I am navigating society's lack of understanding of me

I don't feel disabled. I feel super empowered in my abilities to:

remember

analize

observe

collate mentally

feel deep enough to see beyond heartbreak

see concepts as moving pictures in the mind....

we are all gifted. find your gifts under the tree and open them!

once we accept our gifts as our own, we begin to attract people who complement them with theirs.

•

Get used to being awesome!!

You are a powerful creative force. Full stop.

JT said:

I struggle to without masking my needs

Yes - indeed......although, I feel that I "obfuscate", rather than "mask" my needs.  To put that more simply, I do what I need to do, and then thank people for "understanding and accommodating my oddities".......without telling them why I do what I do.  I am fortunate to be able to "get away" with that.  PS: No need for thanks.....I like the fact that I have things in common with people here......so thank you!

Pleased you have had support. Thanks for the response. Feel free to post links if you have them :) thanks

I struggle to without masking my needs. Some people still probe "why do have you issues with sensory....etc". But its the best way I've found so far. Dodging society's ignorance! PS: Thanks Number

Since I divulged my statuus as disabled due to IBD (not ASC) I was discriminated against by clients who stopped booking me (literally from that day onwards), so I defo dont feel secuure enough to tell emplyers/clients about ASC

I dont have any issue with the labels attached, other than how it affects others responses to it.

Maybe they should give us , like, a yellow armband or something. Or maybe a mark on the forehead.

JT said:

For me the label and stigma are the disabling part

Do you feel the disabling part only comes from other people or also from your perception of yourself with those labels attached?

My experience of others reaction to me disclosing my diagnosis has been either lack of understanding (eg so what does that mean then?) or discriminatory (eg you ain't no retárd made, come off it!) - the only people who have an understanding are those with an autistic family member.

My understaning of the term "disabling" is that it cripples or incapacitates, so I read it that you are finding other peoples reactions are doing this to you. Is this correct?

Do you have an issue with the stigma of it personally or is it all in the eyes of others?

I'm not bothered by people's negative associations about autism, I do get stupid comments at times, but I'd rather be out with it as if people are going to get all snotty about it then I'd rather know sooner rather than latter. I was self employed for a long time too, so I never had any bosses that I had to tiptoe round or accomodations that had to be made. At uni they were practically falling over themselves to make accomodations, so many that I had to refuse some of them.

I agree.  I do as you do.  I have found this to be the easiest way of "keeping it real" these days.  We should both remain thankful that we have the capacity to do so.....not all of us (by any stretch) can do it this way.

Good topic! In my case it’s a bit different - at work (my current one) I told my colleagues and manager what I need but it seemed to not work until I told them I’m autistic. Then I stopped being bullied but I must emphasize- this seems to be an exception! I am just lucky to have understanding and accommodating manager and colleagues. I don’t need much. They know I’m uncomfortable with eye contact and small talk so they don’t push me to do that and they know I’m sensitive so they have no problems with me wearing earplugs and sunglasses. They are happy with my work and I’m happy I finally found job that reduces my anxiety. I work with objects and data and I have very little contact with people. Sometimes I talk a bit with my colleagues if they approach me first. But I agree - most of the people stigmatize and isolate you if they know you are autistic. There is still a lot to do in this topic. I watched a video from the channel “autism from the inside” where Paul Micalleff talk about diagnosis disclosure. And he also said, that we need to be careful and best to not disclose the diagnosis too early, because people mostly don’t know what autism actually is. It’s better to tell them, what you need, without mentioning autism.