Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi. I'm a male, 44, father of two daughters, and married. I pursued diagnosis shortly after I turned 40, and here we are, four years later, and today I was informed that I hit all the criteria for ASD level 1.
I feel relieved that what I long felt is finally confirmed, although there's still a scintilla of doubt that perhaps I 'gamified' the process by knowing what the specialists needed to hear. Is this normal? To be honest I am still processing the diagnosis, and don't really feel much else yet despite putting so much effort to get to this point over the past few years. But this may be due to my alexithymia, and being unable to register what emotions I am currently feeling.
I look forward to reading my report when it is sent to me in the next week or so. In the meantime I am looking for more information. I have seen the usual stuff on YouTube, which frankly I find of limited use - it seems to be either women, or immature men giving their views - but I have yet to settle on which books to read from the plethora available for newly diagnosed adults. Any suggestions for books, etc. that could be helpful from this community?
I'd start with a search in your local library. The books are free to borrow, and you can buy any that help second-hand online once you know what you want to read in more detail. Just because you reserve and borrow a book doesn't mean you have to read it all, you can just browse it.
The first one I read, "The reason I jump" (N. Higashida) was about a boy's experience, interesting, and I was able to read what he said and say yes/no about my experience, even though I'm female.
"The autistic experience" (J James and M.L. Del Vecchio) was very useful, each chapter was thought-provoking and embedded in autistic experiences.
"Divergent mind" (J Nerenberg) was good if you like to understand the big words and what they mean, lots of explanations.
"The autists: women on the spectrum" (C Törnvall) is another interesting one, looks at autism across the ages as she reflects on her journey to diagnosis, including reflections of her marriage.
I have another few I read but didn't find so helpful, and another pile on the coffee table to get through when I get a chance.