Published on 12, July, 2020
This is just an extension of things not making sense to us.
I've known of people telling me that as an adult, friendships are very different and hanging out together and having a fun time isn't something people have the time for. At the same time, I'd see photos of them on Instagram at a theme park or basking in the sunshine or whatever, and fairly regularly.
I get it, adult friendships ARE different to those you had as a child, but I don't get why people tended to discourage me, or made me feel bad for wanting those experiences.
Especially as I didn't get to have much of them as a child so there's a degree of "wanting to make up for it" now, as someone in my mid 20s.
I'm sure someone will tell me that I'm reading into it too much, or I've misinterpreted it.
I find it funny how so many autistic people, myself included talking about their desire to have friends and relationships, when the world labels us as antisocial.
If only they all realised we just struggle with the intensity of it all.
Kind of makes it double sad when it goes wrong. Maybe that's the double empathy theory at play?
I've noticed that strange contradiction too, groups for autistic people seem to assume that we'll all get along fine together because we're all autistic. Do they think that all NT's get on because they're NT? Of course not, but somehow we dont' seem to be allowed not to get on with each other, not in a bad way, but just have nothing to talk about because of different interests, not just big special interests, but little normal things. It still seems like autistic services go to the lowest common denominator instead of allowing us to just be people.
I've learnt this the hard way. I used to believe that just because someone was autistic, they'd be the perfect friend, cos at least they'd understand, but I ignored the fact that we'd tend to clash at least.