So folks,
I don't come here very often. It's been 10 months since I received a formal ASC diagnosis at the age of 47. Since before then I have had counselling with a psychotherapist who specialises in autism, spoken with a 'friend' who leads a counselling team at a local University, with my wife and others who can all see autistic traits in me. I have several autistic kids. I have created a journal of experiences and memories which all demonstrate autistic reactions, traits and behaviours and yet I'm still really struggling to accept that I'm autistic. To the point of (and this is contradictory) that when I refer to myself as autistic and try and own that identity I get a visceral reaction that sometimes includes the arm flailing that first developed as a teenager.
Trying to move on and yet feel so held back by this inability to come to terms. What did any of you do to reconcile with your diagnosis?
Thanks in advance.
