Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm awaiting an initial appointment but don't know what to expect. I've heard these referrals often get closed if you get deemed beyond help because of autism and or long term depression (I have both).
I've had enough letters from the MH system recently saying that they can't help (inc that the GP's request for a psychiatrist referral was turned down twice) which really isn't helpful when you're feeling suicidal.
Are the visits to a psychiatrist always summarised to you in writing afterwards? Can you decline for this to happen if you are concerned that it is only going to be triggering? I admit that I am probably beyond help due to a lifetime of negativity (and I am unable to react any differently to any suggestions made to me which I guess can seem confrontational) but I really don't need this confirmed in writing to me.
I can understand why contact with MH services is triggering for you. I've had multiple referrals declined too and it is truly devastating to have the courage to reach out for help and have yet another door slammed in your face.
Even when you do manage to get to see someone then sadly MH services are woefully inadequate when it comes to supporting autistic adults. They simply do not have the training to understand autism and how to adapt the support they offer. The approaches they take can often leave the autistic person worse and left feeling inadequate and blamed for not trying or not engaging. Unless this particular psychiatrist is an autism 'specialist' then I fear you are being set up for yet another disappointment.
They would rather blame the patient than accept that their approach is wrong or that they have failed to make the adjustments needed to make the service accessible. In my experience they are more interested in the score on those checklists they get you to fill out each session. If they don't think those are going to improve you get discharged and left without any support.
There is an interesting document here on how the services are supposed to support autistic people and what improvements need to be made. It's perhaps worth you referring to that, when requesting what reasonable adjustments you might need to make the support accessible and useful for you.
https://www.england.nhs.uk/long-read/meeting-the-needs-of-autistic-adults-in-mental-health-services/
Personally I've found my mental health has improved since I stopped engaging with them and started embracing my autism more.
Thank you for a very insightful (if depressing!) and interesting response. I'm glad you've found what works for you. Unfortunately in my case, I have avoided the medical profession for many years in trying to deal with long term depression and other issues such as emotional dysregulation but circumstances have escalated these issues to having regular dark thoughts to the point I don't feel like I have any other option.
You must do what you need to keep yourself safe. The fact that you have reached out now suggests that you do see a future in which things could be much improved.
Good luck. I genuinely hope the appointment goes well and that you get the support you need. Try not to forget that you understand yourself and your needs better than anyone else does.
Thank you so much for your kind words x