Autistic partner with depression - I'm struggling.

Hiya,

I have been with my partner for 5 years we are in a lesbian relationship. After increasing struggling for years I suggested she gets assessed for autism. She is now waiting but the mental health social worker thinks she is on the spectrum. 

My Partner hasn't worked for a year because of strikes happening in the industry she works in. so has increasingly got depressed. We now can't go one day without her having a breakdown over what's she's wearing for the day, clothes in general, not having a strong enough plan, the plan being too strong, not knowing what she's going to eat, having the option of whatever she wants to eat but not knowing what that is, what the time is, it being to late, to early. she tells me everyday she wishes she was dead and I just don't have anything left anymore. I'm trying my hardest to be patient and supportive but now I just stand in another room and cry and try not to have a panic attack. 

we are always late for everything if we manage to go at all, I can't go out without her as it's a massive deal if I'm leaving her on her own. she has no friends and no family so it's just me coping on my own, we have approached the doctors and we just have to wait on waiting lists which are months long. or therapy is £55 a session which we can't afford.  There isn't any help out there and she is really struggling.

I feel so suicidal ever day and I just feel like we are sinking lower and lower and no one is listening or helping. it's so hard trying to help someone and getting met with so much aggression or just nothing. She's go no fight left in her having to keep speaking to people and services that don't help or can't help.