Published on 12, July, 2020
Does anyone else ever feel this way? I get told by a friend don’t do things just to appease them but then turn around and ask me to do exactly that. Like I made a huge sacrifice for them years ago and recently they asked me to make another sacrifice for them and even though I don’t want to, I’m going along with it cause they don’t know the huge sacrifice I made for them, nor do I want them to know because they’re neurotypical and it will be misunderstood and made more than it is, so yeah, just feel like I’m just meant to be a pathological people pleaser and I just wonder if there’s any other Autistic who feels this way?
NTs expect you to tell them in ways they communicate if you do something not just kind, but generous.
No one wants to be resented, though some will selfishly keep asking until you negotiate back. It sounds like you don't want to be friends with them. And you don't have to.
I needed to be taught I could choose who I wanted to be close with and who I could keep at distance and that I didn't just have to "take what was given" whether it was a sandwich or a friendship.
However, there are ways to communicate so it's doesn't sound too intense, which is why they become reactionary. It depends what you get in exchange from this relationship?