Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all,
I'm new here, so apologise if this has been asked countless times before.
I'm currently going through my assessment via NHS and have reached the stage where the assessor has asked to speak with my family about my childhood experiences.
I know this is a usual part of the process, but I haven't told my mum and sister that I'm going through it. I'm reluctant to do so, mainly because I haven't had the best relationship with them (we're ok at the moment). I doubt mum even understands what autism is.
What exactly do assessors ask about? Is it based on what I've already told them? What have others' experiences with involving family of origin been like?
I have been told that they don’t have to be involved if I'm uncomfortable with it, but I'm also concerned this might impact the outcome of the diagnosis.
Any input shared would be much appreciated.
Hi ZB
Thank you for sharing.
This is exactly the type of concern I have with involving my family, mum especially. As perceptions differ, the uncertainty of what they'll say makes me hesitant to ask, even if they "mean well".
The friends situation is interesting. I do have a couple of names in mind, but again, I'm reluctant to involve them for similar reasons.
I guess I just feel safer maintaining privacy while I'm being assessed, even it's from those supposedly closest to me.
I didn't include my family because I was 48 when I was (finally!) diagnosed. My mum was dead and my dad wouldn't remember anything from my childhood because "your mum dealt with all of that stuff". Like, I remember my mum telling me I didn't even sit up until I was 18 months old, but my dad said he didn't remember this.
So yeah, I told them there is no-one else who can talk about my childhood than me, and they accepted that. I didn't want them to talk to my dad and for him to say there was nothing wrong and he couldn't remember any difficulties with me, cos that would surely have ruined it!!
I think they asked if I had any friends who could share some insight, but I told them I don't have any friends. At all. People never hang around me for long!
Hi NAS92182, welcome to the online community! The following link provides more information about the diagnostic tools, including interviews:
https://autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/diagnosis/diagnostic-tools/all-audiences
You may find it helpful to use the search button at the top right of the online community page to look up any past similar posts.
I hope this is useful.
Best wishes,
Anna Mod