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Help :(

tigerlily

Hi

Could someone please give me advice, I don't know what to do any more. I'm feeling very lost and alone. 

I'm trying I really am but nothing works. When I try to share about the autism no one understands and people give up. They think I'm rude and uncaring because I struggle to build conversation and to communicate. They always sit there and tell me what I need to do and say to build conversation and to build relationships but when I try to explain to them why I'm struggling with it, I'm told I'm just feeling sorry for myself.

Christmas was tough. My own family have rejected me so I was staying with my godmother, her whole family was over, I didn't know these people and they certainly didn't come to spend time with me. The noise was so crazy, I just had to excape and I think that was wrong somehow. And then Christmas lunch, I didn't think I was going to get through it. It was so loud and voices from every direction, it really hurt.

Why does my head hurt so much when I try to do conversation?

Why doesn't what's in my head come out correct or with the right words?

Yesterday we had made a plan that if there were no trains, my godmother would bring me home. She changed the plan and said I was to wait to today to get the train. Last night she said when would I be leaving and I said whenever, like whenever was suitable. I must have missed something because she turned not nice and went into the kitchen with her husband and started talking about me. When they came back in the room I went to bed and I got up and left the house. 

Now I don't know what to do.

I'm running on empty. Why do people just tell me all the things I do wrong? When will they say something nice? Why do they always want to pick a fight? Why do people even send horrible emails? Or call me a retard in the street? 

Why won't my brain work so people aren't angry with me? 

Parents

  • Can I ask what the reasons were for people spitting and swearing at you were?  Was there a prior exchange of words, or do you live in a small place where everyone knows everyone else, or where they neighbours from your street etc.?

    As autism is an invisible disability as such, there wouldn't be anything very obvious to draw you to peoples' attention usually.  Unless you are hand-flapping or spinning or making any noises, I would have thought you would be able to go on your way without trouble.  Some morons will home in on anyone displaying the slightest difference unfortunately, which could be due to wearing clothes that they don't consider fashionable, or the "right" hairstyle etc.  People with ASC maybe pay less attention sometimes to those sorts of things, which might draw some idiots' attention.

    People slamming buggies into you sound like aggressive chavs.  No decent parent would do that just for the sake of their poor baby/toddler letalone to attack someone with it like a weapon.

    There are plenty of armchair philosophisers out there, so there will always be people who tell you that you are doing something wrong.  The trick is never to ask them, never show that you haven't got a clue about something and to be confident in your choices.  Relatives however are a different matter and will never resist giving you their tuppence worth no matter how unwelcome.

    I have had some anti-social attention from people before, I don't know how it would compare to anyone else's experience as there are so many awful things going on everywhere, you only have to read the newspapers to see that.

Reply

  • Can I ask what the reasons were for people spitting and swearing at you were?  Was there a prior exchange of words, or do you live in a small place where everyone knows everyone else, or where they neighbours from your street etc.?

    As autism is an invisible disability as such, there wouldn't be anything very obvious to draw you to peoples' attention usually.  Unless you are hand-flapping or spinning or making any noises, I would have thought you would be able to go on your way without trouble.  Some morons will home in on anyone displaying the slightest difference unfortunately, which could be due to wearing clothes that they don't consider fashionable, or the "right" hairstyle etc.  People with ASC maybe pay less attention sometimes to those sorts of things, which might draw some idiots' attention.

    People slamming buggies into you sound like aggressive chavs.  No decent parent would do that just for the sake of their poor baby/toddler letalone to attack someone with it like a weapon.

    There are plenty of armchair philosophisers out there, so there will always be people who tell you that you are doing something wrong.  The trick is never to ask them, never show that you haven't got a clue about something and to be confident in your choices.  Relatives however are a different matter and will never resist giving you their tuppence worth no matter how unwelcome.

    I have had some anti-social attention from people before, I don't know how it would compare to anyone else's experience as there are so many awful things going on everywhere, you only have to read the newspapers to see that.

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