Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi I have been posting on here a lot about my boyfriend truth is we not a couple we just more than good friends shall I say. I really have feelings for this guy and it hurts I really want us to be a couple. I have had a conversation with him about where we stand and he not sure on how he feels. I have been in relationships before whereas my more than good friend has not and he is in his 40s now. I really want to open up about how I feel about him and about what I really want which is a relationship. He a good guy last year I helped him recover after his heart attack and open heart surgery and when my mum died a few years ago he was there for me. We are 2 people with autism but the love and support we have given one another is unreal and I know we would be an amazing couple if we both tried. How can I express how I truly feel without overwhelming him? I am seeing him tomorrow as we both go to circus training on Sundays and in the afternoon I will be chilling over his and I really want to open up about everything when it’s just the 2 of us.
Ask him how he feels about you?
I have and he confused he not sure how he feels he just says he trying to process everything and it’s overwhelming.
Give him time. Enjoy being with him! It can be hard to make a decision like that. Often when one thinks one could lose someone, and one realizes one would miss them more than one misses a friend... BUT there again, friendship that is so hard to find is really missed when it is gone, so itcould be a fear that though hereally likes you, if you started getting closer and things didn't work out, he could lose you as a friend as well so he is cautious of taking the risk? I had this happen to me in the past where I parted with a girlfriend and I missed her soo much as a friend which was far more painful... She was such a beautiful kind hearted lady! I have found it hard to make friends and harder to keep them! And I won't say impossible but it seems like it to have ever found a girlfriend... (I have twicehad girlfriends in my life but the second was distance dating where we rarely got to meet and we also only ever kissed or hugged the once. So really, a proper "Steady" girlfriend I could say once and it lasted six months and I was very close but we never actually had sex as I was saving that for marriage. Suddenly ended without warning and no arguaments... She just cut all contact... I became suicidal as I thought I had done something wrong though I couldn't think what. Six months later I found out she had been dating at least two others (And one was sexually) at the same time I was dating her! So my experience of dating to advise is limited as I have not really been that successful. (Both cases they asked me out. I was hopeless of picking up on flirting hints with women so I hardly ever asked any lady out incase I got it wrong which is probably why I am single and old!) :D
It is a hard one to know what best to do for you... I think you should ask again but say either way you want to stay friends. That way he will feel safe and will give an answer that is not in fear of losing your friendship. Does this make sense?
I hope it goes well for you. I love happy endings and things that work out!