Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello,
Last week, I was diagnosed with ASD and obviously this is a massive adjustment to try to process. I struggle in busy, overwhelming environments and I'm wondering how I can make this process a bit easier for myself. I wear noise cancelling headphones which help me massively as well as using fidget toys, but I still don't feel like people around me understand or can tell that I'm visibly struggling.
Is it worth me getting something like a lanyard? Or does this draw too much attention to myself for no reason?
I hope that someone can point me in a good direction, I feel so lost since the diagnosis and have no idea how to move forward.
In point of the lanyard, I find my sunflower lanyard really helpful for a couple of big reasons.
1. is that it reminds people of their manners. I sometimes take a bit longer to do things, especially when I'm fighting sensory overwhelm. Without lanyards this can lead to people getting snappish or suspicious of me. With the lanyard they just move on.
2. Is that it allows people a specific reason for my slightly odd behaviours so they don't come up with their own. If you appear distressed on a train station platform (which I generally am due to the Noise and People) you can end up with a few more people coming up with an explanation that means they think they should talk to you, whereas I'd really rather not. But with the lanyard, bam, obvious explanation right there, no conversation needs to be had.
3. This is one that I haven't noticed as much but a friend who has just started using sunflower lanyards has. People literally give you more space. This is quite possibly more to do with 'oo different person scary' than actual consideration, but it is still a bonus, and why fight a bonus.
NAS89452 said: I feel so lost since the diagnosis and have no idea how to move forward.
OK, take a deep breath and realise that you are no different today than you were before the diagnosis. Nothing has changed except you now know what was the underlying cause of some of your behaviours.
Go back to your routines, your job (if you work) or whatever was your life before and continue as normal.
What you should do is start to research autism and if you can afford it, get a therapist who has experience in autism to help you put things in perspective.
There are loads of therapists listed here:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/counselling/england?category=autism
Look for one who is in your price range (typically around £50/hour) and budget for a few sessions at least if you can afford it.
To understand autism I would start with the followig:
Understanding Autism For Dummies - Stephen Shore, Linda G. Rastelli, Temple Grandin (2006)ISBN 0764525476
You can probably get the Kindle version from Amazon and start reading online straight away of you can't wait for it to arrive.
Once you work out which traits are autistic then you can look at how people cope with them and see how many of these work for you - the objective here is to reduce the impact of the traits that negatively affect you so you have a lower level of anxiety in your day to day life.
Once you have a good handle on your traits then it may be helpful to search the forums here (magnifying glass on the top right beside the pink Donate button) for keywords relating to the traits and see what other people have been talking about - chances are you will learn loads from this that you can consider trying yourself.
Asy questions, join in discussions and use this site as a learning tool - we share loads of tip every day so chances are you will find answers you didn't even know you were looking for.
Welcome to the club by the way.
I wear a sunflower lanyard whenever I go to the dentist or hospital or whatever. I haven't had attention at all. A doctor picked up on it but I don't get stared at or anything.
I feel with that, you might be able to avoid the awkward part of telling someone you're autistic. Mine has "I'm Autistic" on the front too.
Noise cancelling headphones is a good idea.