Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello,
I just got my formal diagnosis for Autism this morning at the age of 40.
I feel so mixed up and never felt more confused my life! I have a massive sense of relief, that now finally something explains why I struggle with things as much as I do and why I react to things in a certain way. I feel angry that no one (myself included) recognised it sooner, that I’ve struggled so much, even ending up hospitalised in a psychiatric ward, and no one there even considered autism as a diagnosis, that my parents never recognised it in me or my teachers. I feel scared about what this now means for the future, about whether to tell people, how I move forward from this. I feel numb. I feel sad that this is my life and resent the diagnosis. I feel like I want to shout it from the rooftops, and also tell not a soul. I feel like I need to research every single thing even more than I have already. I feel like celebrating and crying all at the same time.
I just wondered if this was a ‘normal’ response to getting a diagnosis? How did other people feel? What did you do next?
Hi Sloan
I was diagnosed in January this year aged 64 at the time. For me it is entirely positive and I tell everyone, it explains everything and is empowering me to overturn years of abuse and neglect at the hands of some (many actually but not all) in the NHS.
Oh it is so good to hear that for you it has been entirely positive. That’s fantastic for you and your journey. I hope that once it all sinks in a bit more I can find more positives to the whole thing!