Published on 12, July, 2020
Neurosplaining...By analogy with 'mansplaining', I guess; the act of telling a neurodivergent person how they experience their neurodivergence.
A new word for my vocabulary today, but wondered whether anyone else had heard it before.
I can't claim any credit for inventing this new lexical item here, but I like it and yes it does nicely sum up some rubbish we hear from others (sadly, often professionals as frequently as friends and family). I just came across it in a post on LinkedIn from a psychologist and neuroinclusion specialist. It's made my day. So, I thought I'd share.
My doctor neurosplains me every time he tells me I "suffer with autism". Or tells me he regrets that "he cannot cure my autism".
Has anyone neurosplained you recently?
Thanks Ben
Very well put, Pegg, a most excellent metaphor.
Ben
That's been my experience as well. It does little for self confidence and makes me want to shut myself away.
No wonder so many of us suffer from impostor syndrome, when we do occasionally ‘open up’ to people we think would understand, we just get shutdown again and made to feel self doubt once more.
I’m sure ND people do have positive experiences, but reading through most of the replies, the world is still a very ignorant place.
Many of us have spent much of our lives trying just that, simply because we didn't know we were autistic and were made to feel like a failed neurotypical.
It doesn't work. We cannot be anyone other than who we are inside. A mask only covers the outside.
Apparently according to non autistics, being autistic is just a fashion accessory! (Joking)
How? Like it's something you wear, or a lifestyle choice?
People really don't get it...
Katy Chocolate Lover said:Another thing someone said before was "have you tried not being autistic?"
This comment makes no sense whatsoever! You can’t remove your brain!
People clearly do not understand that being autistic means that our brain is wired differently and to remove that would mean we wouldn’t be alive!
Sorry if this has triggered anyone, I didn’t mean to think so deeply I was just trying to articulate how nonsensical this comment is.
By the way, Katy Chocolate Lover just so you know you are awesomely autistic!
I get your drawing. It can be just like that...
It is a sad fact that people do judge and it happens frequently.
The social anxiety experienced by many autistic people is often for good reason. It is defined as 'anxiety or fear in situations where they may be scrutinized, evaluated, or judged by others'.
Current CBT therapies will try to convince the autistic person that their fear is irrational, despite it being based upon very real experiences of being judged and negatively evaluated.
See?? Artist...
Looks like me when the phone rings...
Yes, defo, you.... Artist!
Knowing from experience how it feels to be judged by others, I don't do it.
A metaphor about judging others might be - Judging people closes doors, accepting people for who they are keeps them open..
If the door is open, you can see a broader horizon.
Like C and DeSpereaux, I often feel I'm about to be judged by people........ too often, in fact.
i think sometimes it is even better to not mention autism but just address each challenge individually- eg say ‘I am sensitive to noise and lights’ . I find environments with many people overwhelming etc. It is sad but so many people see a negative connotation with autism and don’t understand what it means. But they are much more understanding when you point out specific challenges… it shouldn’t be like that though
It’s really sad because this document explaining needs of autistic students was meant to help but I worry it is actually being held against me now and making me be viewed differently in a non positive way
The sad thing is that I actually also have a support document from university which is meant to explain what it means to be autistic and what some of the challenges can be and how to best accommodate and it has some information specific to me. My supervisor initially didn’t read it as far as I can tell. Now I think he has but it now feels like he is just using it as a way to highlight my inadequacies. I feel quite discriminated against and some of the points he raises / claims about me don’t really apply to me and it just feels like the list has given inspiration….
I think that the card should not used terminology that served as an umbrella-term for professionals, because civilians start arbitrarily-slinging the terms around without understanding, I think it’s best to use layman’s-terms..
I also feel like I’m always about to be judged by people..