Paid Work Woes

But how long do you struggle in the world before you say "that's enough?"

I did academically well at school and would have gone to university if my mental strength hadn't gone by that point. I was somewhat naive as well and very unpopular too. Actually, the only reason I went to college was to put off the whole job thing as long as possible. I had no plan then and still don't now, although the only advantage I have now is that I know why (I was only diagnosed this year).

I have no money at all after my savings ran out, my mother doesn't have that much and her husband is in debt- I've been told that when he retires next year, they will no longer be able to keep me in the house. Lately they've been struggling with the bills as it is. I am basically an expensive inconvenience and I see no way of getting out of the house.

At least you can say to yourself the only way is up.  You could be like me: got my first job even before I left school, managed a string of office jobs (with a brief stint in a shop that I got sacked from in-between), got overlooked for promotions, got sent on an assertiveness course because they thought my bluntness and faux pas meant I was too assertive (I came out as passive in the tests, hah!), was made redundant and had a long string of temp jobs, followed by jobs where I was again made redundant (well, if your face doesn't fit) suffered workplace bullying, went on stress leave and have ended up now barely functioning, in no way fit for work and defeated by NT society.

Because we are all distinctive individuals with a wide range of severities (or mildnesses) of autistic 'spectrum', comparisons are inappropriate.  However I will make the observation here, all the same, for what it is worth.

At 18 I left school after three feeble attempts at O' Levels, mostly repeats. After several months fruitless job searching I worked four months as a clerk (catastrophically), then several months seeking work, then four months as a reporter on a pathetic weekly (my unrealistic ambition foiled), more time job searching, then six months as an orderly in a hospital, wards and theatre.

Somewhat numbed by bullying because I was good entertainment, I was generally regarded as a retard, with the only compensation that someone worse than me was designated "village idiot" within my age group. At 16 at a careers talk in the assembly hall the speaker hoped none of us would end up as a dustman, and there was a resounding chorus of my name. When I tried to go to college for a few weeks I was followed around by a crowd of school contemporaries mocking me in public.

I went to FE college at 20, and got into university the following year on special entry. At the time people were saying it must have been fixed in some way and it wouldn't last. By 29 I had a degree and a PhD. I still had trouble in the job market for many years because interview panels obsessed with me about the poor school results, the short work periods before college, and my times out of work. There's still that absurd notion you have to be guilty about early setbacks, like is it really that important?

One of the things I think happened to me, whether scientifically valid, is that I had maturity delays. I was very naiive and slow witted in my teens, but underwent sudden dramatic changes in early 20s, mid 20s and late 20s, and again mid-30s. I reckon puberty didn't happen properly. Always meant that apart from acute social difficulties I was always seen as a bit naiive and immature.

As I say, it isn't possible to do cross comparisons because we are so varied as individuals. 

I'd just venture to say that what seems bleak now, doesn't always have to remain so. Hopefully you will find a way through it all.

Thankfully we do have a bus stop here, where the buses come every hour. Most of the trouble I have with public transport is a) the cost and b) that often the final destination doesn't have the last leg of the journey available by public transport, which is annoying.

No, my relatives are all either pensionable or are married with young children. I actually don't talk to my extended family at all (actually, including my brother since he moved out). They don't interest me. 

Part of my problem is that I have no talents that I've found yet. I'm not good at anything, or even "reasonable" at anything. My only apparent talent is the ability to sweep up piles of rabbit poo, (a compliment taken from one of my volunteering managers). The only jobs I feel up for are things they don't pay people for anyway (I wish I got paid for clearing up rabbit poo!)

~Edit- I just found, in our county capitol, a week long job for a litter picker. Now there's something I could do... except there is very little information on the notice and that worries me a bit, but also that they want an 8am start and there aren't buses that early here *sigh*

I think you've raised one important issue - small town, middle of nowhere.

A lot of your contemporaries have probably had to look for opportunities elsewhere, by moving to the nearest big town or city. This may not be so easy for you if you live with your parents on account of needing their support.

The range of jobs in even a small village used to be quite large, but everyone nowadays drives to a bigger centre, or a shopping mall. Many villages have no shop or petrol station. Some small towns have no bank, or they might have a restricted times bank and no cash point.Gradually even in small towns the services migrate to the bigger centres.

So the range of opportunities can be small to start with, and the policy to cut back bus services in recent years has left quite a few villages a mile from a bus stop, as a minimum requirement, and small towns may not have buses every day. If the jobs available aren't good ones for someone on the spectrum then you are stuck.

Is there a relative or someone connected to your family with whom you would be happy to stay weeknights, so as to be able to go to a bigger town to find work? Or is there a lifts scheme that would enable you to work away, or is your town lucky enough to have decent bus connections?  Could your parents give you a lift to a regular bus route or train station? Or would you be adversely affected by the travelling?

Are there things you can do well that would be valued in a local community, like working with engines, helping the elderly, horticultural work, or local authority work maintaining local services.

It probably needs a bit of standing back and having a fresh look at what your town offers, or asking people to give some fresh thought to it for you.

Easier said than done, don't you think?

I think you need to be a little more upbeat in your approach.

I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere, so when I say "supermarket" I mean a smaller shop belonging to a supermarket chain, so I think it is tills or nothing with regards to this particular vacancy and there aren't really likely to be any others.

As for the link you provided, it starts off by saying "In England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales there are careers services" and then completely fails to mention anywhere in England. I guess if you are English, they expect you to Google it.

You might want to apply for something like shelf-stacking instead of till work, or stores/warehouse type jobs.

You can put in those sections where you need to explain periods of unemployment that you have been working in a voluntary capacity (sell your devotion and selflessness in doing so) and now you are ready to take on a career with prospects and are happy to work your way up.

This might be useful: http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/employment/help-from-your-local-careers-service.aspx