Feeling upset by the way people talk about autism even though they don’t mean to

Hi, It has happened a few times now that I have felt quite upset and triggered by the way people talk about autism. I now work as a developmental neurobiologist so inevitably I end up in situations at work where autism is being mentioned or talked about. For example today, someone defined autistic traits as ‘being unable to act in a social manner and not being able to perform in society’. Then there have been numerous occasions where autism is referred to as a ‘developmental disorder’ , people talk about deficits, treatment etc.  I know this isn’t meant to be upsetting and I am not expecting people to change how they talk about it but I still find this upsetting. I then wonder - am I really that broken? It also makes me worry what people would think about me if they knew I was autistic- would they then see me as an unsociable person unable to perform in society? I am feeling quite insecure and overwhelmed anyways at the moment with new work, recently moving etc, so I am being overly sensitive and crippled from low confidence in myself anyways. I almost burst into tears today because I felt so inadequate as I was listening to all this talk about how dysfunctional autistic people are. Does anyone have any advice on how to cope with these situations? I feel like there are so many misconceptions about autistic people out there that lots of people must have experienced similar in various settings.