Published on 12, July, 2020
I have problems with being able to tell what my body is feeling in general, usually in terms of just feeling uncomfortable instead of knowing that I'm too warm or whatever. This is particularly a problem around this time of year, where we've moved past winter and into the bit where you need to decide if it's too hot for a jacket or too cold for shorts.
Like this morning I woke up feeling really uncomfortable and I have no idea if that was because it's gotten too warm for my spring/autumn duvet or if I'm having a period of bad anxiety (which is very scary to me because of past experiences). Same if I'm sitting on the sofa and it's too warm for jeans and a hoodie. I've had a few mental health disasters (which I now know might have been meltdowns or shutdowns or whatever; I'm newly diagnosed so still trying to figure out how my experiences line up with autistic terms), and they've always been around this time of year. I wonder if my body struggling to deal with the temperature changing so much so quickly has contributed to the times when my brain has just collapsed.
Yes, on already warm days I cannot bear to be in direct sunlight for too long, and at night if the temp is very warm I end up sleeping with the window open or else I can't sleep or have a really rough night. With that said I can't do the cold for long either unless I'm on the move. I have a very reactive metabolism so when I start moving I burn up calories very quickly but that makes my whole body feel unbearably hot even if it's really cold around me. So on cold days I have to be constantly moving, but not too vigorously... it's weird.