Published on 12, July, 2020
Currently I am struggling, probably going through a shutdown as people have noticed I’ve become withdrawn.
The cause of this is my employers, it has left me no choice but to look for another job. My manager changes my rota without asking which disturbs my routine, I am told I will never progress for promotion where I am due to my health issues although I haven’t asked for any workplace adjustments. I don’t get regular lunchtimes. When I confided in a senior at the company, he said “everyones a little autistic”.(I am a adult late diagnosed, whilst working for this company, HR never came to speak to me about it post diagnosis, pre diagnosis the HR Director said “autism is very common these days”).
I am told I should learn to adapt my autism to the work environment by a senior staff. By nature I am an introvert, and keep on getting told I need to be more outgoing and louder. As an employee my work is spot on they have no complaints I’m meticulous but I lack hitting the targets marginally and thats why I keep on getting threatened to be put on reviews, this induces anxiety and fear of losing my job. I work in a bright, noisy environment and have a customer facing job, I mask highly to get on with it, I am good at what I do, money is not the motivator, we are commission based with a basic salary. My motivation is the product I sell, its one of my special interests.
Are there other autistics who have been dealing with discrimination, bullying, underestimation of intelligence or employers not caring ?
Do you just leave and find elsewhere or challenge their ignorance and lack of training on neurodiversity?
My otherhalf ticks so many criteria boxes for autism that I don't so I suspected him to be autistic for a while, but it came down to this question:"when talking to people do you have to remind yourself to act normal (smile/make appropriate eye contact, etc,)?" and he sad no.So now I'm convinced there is a middleground state between being ADHD and Autistic but is in fact neither, but it's own thing that looks like a really nebulous unplaceable nerodivergent. Because whatever he is it isn't neurotypical. And I am now suspecting there are more like him out there that are not diagnosable as having a specific neurotype other than literally "not neurotypical". If anything it's like a psuedo neurotypical, they function well enough to slip "under the radar" but outside of a professional setting when they get home and their mask comes off they are definitely some kind of neurodivergent in interests, mannerisms, emotional responses etc. In their natural relaxed state they are definitely not "typical" anything.
🐝 Bees 🐝 (they/them) Autism resources in bio #stoptheshock #NothingAboutUsWithoutUs said:"when talking to people do you have to remind yourself to act normal (smile/make appropriate eye contact, etc,)?" and he sad no.
If he has unknowingly been masking for a very long time, he may not realise.
After my recent diagnosis I have been thinking over my life. I have realised that although I make eye contact in, I think, an appropriate manner, I actually prefer to find ways of avoiding it (holding onto and petting my dog is a very acceptable way of achieving this). I do know that as a child I hid behind my smile. If I am walking along a street, I compulsively smile at everyone coming towards me. Is this what NTs do?
Remember that autism is a _spectrum_ condition, not every ND ticks every box and those that they do they may have in varying degree and exhibit in different ways. On top of that, ASD people have personalities as well as ASD too.