Published on 12, July, 2020
My 9 year old son is stressing hugely about going swimming with his school class this month.
He did it last year for two weeks - with lessons every afternoon - but found it very overwhelming and the thought of doing it again is leading to daily meltdowns.
He is worried about his head going under - it happened last time briefly once - and struggles to get himself changed and re-dressed in time as he has dyspraxia as well as autism.
The smell of chlorine and the noise of the other children in the pool also cause him a lot of anxiety.
We have tried to reassure him things will be ok and also emphasised how important it is to learn to swim but fear that forcing him to do this may prove counter-productive.
He already finds school extremely stressful and seems burnt out by this. Are we pushing too hard or would allowing him to miss lessons with a view to me teaching him over time be a mistake in the long run?
Have you spoken to the school about it? Learning to swim is important and I'm sure there are way to do that without stressing your lad out..
No one could teach me as a child. I had some of the same problems. I don't like my head under water, I'd get panicked if other people were splashing and boisterous around me or there were too many bodies in the pool and I could not tolerate anyone touching me in the water to support me to swim.
I did learn in my early 20s. I went with a friend when it was really quiet. I asked my friend to swim while I studied his movements very carefully. I then copied, sticking within my depth for a good while, but I did it. I lived in France at the time where the pool was outdoors all summer. I used to go swimming alone when it was raining after that. There would only be me and the attendant. Swimming in the rain turned out to be a rare sensory joy, actually.
Glad you overcame your swimming difficulties. Your reply gives me hope for my son. We will definitely try to take him when it's quiet. We have talked with the school and they are helping to take some of the pressure off him by saying he can opt out if he wishes. Thanks for sharing your experience.
My daughter was not making any progress with learning to swim at school, so on holiday I made some efforts to teach her myself, in the hotel swimming pool. The breakthrough came when I noticed that she was trying to swim in too shallow water. When she pushed herself forward off her feet she would immediately sink her head under the water. I took her out to where the water was up to her armpits and when she pushed off her head stayed above water. By the end of the holiday she could swim a width of the pool unaided.