Published on 12, July, 2020
My 9 year old son is stressing hugely about going swimming with his school class this month.
He did it last year for two weeks - with lessons every afternoon - but found it very overwhelming and the thought of doing it again is leading to daily meltdowns.
He is worried about his head going under - it happened last time briefly once - and struggles to get himself changed and re-dressed in time as he has dyspraxia as well as autism.
The smell of chlorine and the noise of the other children in the pool also cause him a lot of anxiety.
We have tried to reassure him things will be ok and also emphasised how important it is to learn to swim but fear that forcing him to do this may prove counter-productive.
He already finds school extremely stressful and seems burnt out by this. Are we pushing too hard or would allowing him to miss lessons with a view to me teaching him over time be a mistake in the long run?
I think allowing him to miss lessons with a view to you teaching him over time is a good solution, but there are lots of options.
I have found different approaches have helped my kids. One needed to go to the pool for the first session but not take part, just familiarise themself with the process, the routine, took a sketch pad for something comforting to do, then was able to take part in every second session.
The other found the pool, and the other groups just too loud. They couldn't hear the coach and it was really stressful so we have found local lessons in a quieter pool on a quieter day but there's a waiting list. So, while we do that, I will be teaching them myself.
The travel aspect was stressful for them too with School sessions. So there may be ways to accommodate that.
I think the bottom line is yes you are 100% right swimming is an important life skill but there are so many ways how they learn can they can find ones that fit.
Wishing you both all the best!