My name is Emma, I'm 30 years old and I think I may be autistic. I have spent my entire life feeling different, out of place, not a "real" person. I had never considered I may be autistic until meeting another female with autism and learning more about how it presents in females.
I have since done extensive research on autism in females, diagnostic criteria and done some of the assessment tools I have been able to access. All of these have indicated to me there is a high likelihood of autism. I should also mention that I have a background in adult nursing and although I don't have a background of looking after people with ASD, I feel confident enough in my education and background to know how to follow assessment tools and have enough clinical suspicion to say that I meet the criteria for diagnosis.
I guess I'm just scared to speak to a healthcare professional about this. I have struggled for a long time with my mental health and I don't have a lot of trust in doctors in general. I feel like they will automatically dismiss me, as they have done with so many other things. I find GP appointments really scary and actually quite intimidating and I wonder if I sometimes don't always get my point across to them in the most coherent way (especially because I normally visit my GP when my anxiety is very high and my brain is all over the place). I wondered if anyone had any advice about their experiences approaching a their Dr for a referral to ASD diagnosis services? Have people found it helpful to write things down in form of a letter or something like that? I feel like I'm pretty coherent when I'm writing so would be able to get my point across much better on paper than in person.
I also wouldn't mind some reassurance that I'm not making all this up in my head? The more I learn about autism, the more I feel at home. I feel comforted by the fact there are other people out there like me and I'm not alone. I have never been able to explain why I have felt different my whole life and why life has been one big confusing mess of an experience for me until I learned more about autism. Have other people felt this way as well?
Thank you for reading
