can social skills be taught?

I keep coming across claims that people with Asperger's Syndrome or HFASD can be taught or shown how to overcome social/communication difficulties. 

This seems to be what underpins help given to people on the spectrum in special schools or learning disability support in mainstream. Or all these consultants who offer training in social skills to school age children (for a fee) because what they achieve by a long arduous process that sorts socialising at school will somehow magically resolve socialising as an adult in an adult world.

It also seems to underlie the assumption that you grow out of it. Hence transition isn't a big issue for abler children who will magicly transform into social butterflies by 18 or 21.

Which is again why so little has been done to better understand the needs of adults. Adults with socialising problems it seems were children who didn't learn their social skills lessons at school and are now paying the price for their indolence and ingratitude. Once "taught" how to conquer social interaction its all your fault if you don't magically get over the rest.

I just wonder what research underpins the confidence that this kind of social coaching in school years has any long term value. Because surely for all the claims made, there has to be evidence. If this was medication or cosmetics there would have to be a substantial body of evidence. Where is the substantial body of evidence that people on the spectrum can be taught social skills for life?

I personally, at the abler end, without a diagnosis (as diagnosed late in life) found ways round formal social interaction by finding out why I got into trouble, finding people who were understanding enough to help me, and then learning the right things to say on cue, which took me decades. But it is still hard work and I still make mistakes.

Even so I still lose credibility if there's background noise, where I lose coherence, or there are two many cross-overs in the dialogue, or I'm unwell or flagging, or I blank out.

And that's only with formal conversation. As it gets less formal, less language based more gestures, nods and inflexions based I lose out rapidly. OK I was self-taught, maybe if I had been "coached" when younger I might have been better at it. But I cannot find published evidence that "coaching" of social skills works long term. It might produce short term benefits for young people in their immediate social contexts, but the root causes haven't been resolved, and there needs to be research that substantiates claims it works long term.

As I have already said, if this was medication or cosmetics there would have to be a substantial body of proof. I don't see why autistic spectrum "cures" don't seem to need a body of proof. At the moment there's just a lot of uncorroborated quackery going on.

I do feel NAS has a duty to pursue (or at least demand) scientific evidence for autism "cures".

No-one should be permitted to claim they can coach social skills unless they can provide proof of long term benefit, into adulthood. The impression that someone can be egged on to manage in a few short-lived social settings is not scientific corroboration of efficacy.

I just think it is time we had some science to this, and science we could see.

Parents
  • during the past two days i had a conversation with one of my friend who got annoyed because of my so called insensitive, or even sarcastic posts that she could read on a social medium. many of them were not what she accused me of (at least in my eyes) and she also appears to have some issue with self esteem as she likes her own statuses and affirmates that she loves herself so why not (she used to have psychotherapist consultations in the past). i can be a bit cynical sometimes and i know that some people understand this and appreciate a funny side of it. i am trying not to offend anyone, but this is not 100% avoidable if some people are too self oriented and concious even about things that were not directed to them. i admit that also i am short of certain social skills and i am best on my own, but i also appreciate a company from time to time. i consider myself as clever enough to spot the behaviour pattern that can lead to social conflicts and try to avoiding them but sometimes it just is not possilbe, whether it was my fault of someone`s elses. and there are normal people that sometimes fail to read the signs and take things wrong, too. so where is the border? 

    i also have difficulties understanding human speech with a background noises, whether in the phone or face to face. i have noticed that instead into eyes i look everybody on their mouth when they are talking. just to make sure i have missed nothing from what they were saying. this came naturally, i just noticed this happening. on the other hand, i think i have an excellent sense of hearing for sounds and noises or even a music. i might not have an absolute hearing like musicians have but i am deffinitely not on the deaf side. i get annoyed especially by a high pitch or sirens, it makes me feel panicked and i feel my "kidneys shaking" and like going crazy in my head when a car with a siren on passes by me on the road. is this normal?  also concentrating on reading is impossible with somebody talking in the room, relaxing music also does not do me a big favor. 

    i am best with written language, i even better remember new words or numbers when they are written. yet i do not possess an extraordinary photographic memory. 

    i believe that things can be trained to a certaine extent, depending on the potential and effort of each individual, but i do not think we can completely be cured. if there was some damage done to the brain, despite it is able to repair itself, some damages are far beyond getting to the normal. yet, my ex-classmate suffered a stroke at her late 20s, was completely dependent on help, she needed to be washed, fed, etc. her cerebellum was out of order, but she managed to recover, now walks (although awkwardly a bit), moves freely on the public and on her own and what is very interesting, recently she managed to finish a BSc. degree, i think she got the first class or close to that. almost a miracle. she is about 34 now. she needed a special approach, more time for exams, etc, but she made it. 

Reply
  • during the past two days i had a conversation with one of my friend who got annoyed because of my so called insensitive, or even sarcastic posts that she could read on a social medium. many of them were not what she accused me of (at least in my eyes) and she also appears to have some issue with self esteem as she likes her own statuses and affirmates that she loves herself so why not (she used to have psychotherapist consultations in the past). i can be a bit cynical sometimes and i know that some people understand this and appreciate a funny side of it. i am trying not to offend anyone, but this is not 100% avoidable if some people are too self oriented and concious even about things that were not directed to them. i admit that also i am short of certain social skills and i am best on my own, but i also appreciate a company from time to time. i consider myself as clever enough to spot the behaviour pattern that can lead to social conflicts and try to avoiding them but sometimes it just is not possilbe, whether it was my fault of someone`s elses. and there are normal people that sometimes fail to read the signs and take things wrong, too. so where is the border? 

    i also have difficulties understanding human speech with a background noises, whether in the phone or face to face. i have noticed that instead into eyes i look everybody on their mouth when they are talking. just to make sure i have missed nothing from what they were saying. this came naturally, i just noticed this happening. on the other hand, i think i have an excellent sense of hearing for sounds and noises or even a music. i might not have an absolute hearing like musicians have but i am deffinitely not on the deaf side. i get annoyed especially by a high pitch or sirens, it makes me feel panicked and i feel my "kidneys shaking" and like going crazy in my head when a car with a siren on passes by me on the road. is this normal?  also concentrating on reading is impossible with somebody talking in the room, relaxing music also does not do me a big favor. 

    i am best with written language, i even better remember new words or numbers when they are written. yet i do not possess an extraordinary photographic memory. 

    i believe that things can be trained to a certaine extent, depending on the potential and effort of each individual, but i do not think we can completely be cured. if there was some damage done to the brain, despite it is able to repair itself, some damages are far beyond getting to the normal. yet, my ex-classmate suffered a stroke at her late 20s, was completely dependent on help, she needed to be washed, fed, etc. her cerebellum was out of order, but she managed to recover, now walks (although awkwardly a bit), moves freely on the public and on her own and what is very interesting, recently she managed to finish a BSc. degree, i think she got the first class or close to that. almost a miracle. she is about 34 now. she needed a special approach, more time for exams, etc, but she made it. 

Children
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