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Shame and anxiety about special interest?

Daniel

Ok, I’m not going to talk about what my special interest is because it’s on the “spicy/saucy/naughty” side (nothing illegal I will add) and I’d rather not get banned from this space.

Because of its nature and societies general views on such things, I can end up feeling very anxious about it and get a sense of shame. It’s something I really love to read and learn about but at times it just feels like this impossible thing to do as I just have this sense that I shouldn’t be enjoying this sort of stuff. It’s really hard to talk to people about it and find other like minded people who are ok with you just info dumping about it.

Also because of my additional support needs it can be really hard to be involve and do things around it and that I want to do. It can just leave me with this sense of being unfulfilled and inferior to others. I struggle to self advocate and express what I want, and when I do I can come across as pushy or demanding or obsessive about something, I just can’t seem to get a balance.

I’m ranting a bit now, just wondering if anyone else has similar thoughts and feelings around their special interests and being able to take part?

Parents

  • Well... I write fanfiction.  The spicy kind, at times kinky, at times very explicit, at times full of emotion or examining all kinds of issues that affect me.  I've written about an autistic angel, a polyamourous Devil, queer superheroes and male pregnancies.  I've even written things with tentacles.  

    I have to keep that kind of thing quiet at work and obviously don't use my real name.  But the interactions and appreciation I get from posting this kind of thing have shown me that there are people out there into all sorts of things.  Some things are best kept quiet in our public lives, but there are safe spaces to enjoy them.  I also struggle with group online spaces, but the one to one conversations on the AO3 fanfiction site work for me.

  • in reply to Glitter

    Disgusting... Unrelated but is there a link so I can inspect this evilness? Grin

    I jest, of course. If you have fun and it's doing no one else any harm then you go right ahead.

    One of my own special interests is in womens clothes, nothing sexual but to a lot of men must seem unusual. It is just an interest in the patterns and designs, colours, styles. I'm not ashamed. It's purely just an interest.

    Embrace your interests and hobbies my friends.

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  • in reply to Glitter

    Disgusting... Unrelated but is there a link so I can inspect this evilness? Grin

    I jest, of course. If you have fun and it's doing no one else any harm then you go right ahead.

    One of my own special interests is in womens clothes, nothing sexual but to a lot of men must seem unusual. It is just an interest in the patterns and designs, colours, styles. I'm not ashamed. It's purely just an interest.

    Embrace your interests and hobbies my friends.

Children
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