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Did anyone's masking unconsciously just stop happening after adult diagnosis?

TokyoMoon4
over 1 year ago

Hi everyone,

This is my very first post here on the forum!

I was officially diagnosed with autism last Monday, I knew I was, but there was something around to official diagnosis that changed me. 

I have been consciously trying to continue to mask at work, people would normally see me as a bubbly, outgoing, confident individual and I didn't intend to let my work "mask" slip any time soon. However, I find myself being more blunt when answering things, and being more reserved when I would normally be super involved in group meetings. To the point where my colleagues joke about me being quiet "for once" and wondering if something is up.

I actually didn't even know I was doing anything different, I thought I just had nothing to say on the topics being discussed, but I don't really feel ready at all to discuss this with my peers or boss (even if I ever do!)

Just wondering what everyone else's experience is like with this? I have heard a lot about learning to unmask but I just haven't gotten that far yet given it is really new for me.

Thank you

Parents
  • over 1 year ago

    Yes, I can feel my mask slipping suddenly. I'm at the point of starting to come out to other people that I'm autistic and I haven't consciously said to myself that I'd stop masking, but I find myself just allowing myself to be me. I should say that I don't have an official diagnosis yet, but have spent several years doing a tonne of research and it's made a huge amount of sense of my mess of a life!

    And I think I feel as though it should be ok to just be myself - I'm finding it easier to stop worrying about what other people think if I'm quiet or abrupt or forgetful. It's exhausting putting on an act and I'm fed up with expending that energy for the sake of other people. It feels like it's about time they started learning that autistic people's comfort and wellbeing matters too and that means accepting that sometimes people are quiet and that doesn't mean they're shy or stupid and sometimes people forget birthdays, but that doesn't mean they're uncaring. Sometimes people find small talk utterly dull and that's ok, not all of us like the same things. And to be fair, small talk is utterly dull! Can't see the point when there are so many actually interesting things to talk about! :D

Reply
  • over 1 year ago

    Yes, I can feel my mask slipping suddenly. I'm at the point of starting to come out to other people that I'm autistic and I haven't consciously said to myself that I'd stop masking, but I find myself just allowing myself to be me. I should say that I don't have an official diagnosis yet, but have spent several years doing a tonne of research and it's made a huge amount of sense of my mess of a life!

    And I think I feel as though it should be ok to just be myself - I'm finding it easier to stop worrying about what other people think if I'm quiet or abrupt or forgetful. It's exhausting putting on an act and I'm fed up with expending that energy for the sake of other people. It feels like it's about time they started learning that autistic people's comfort and wellbeing matters too and that means accepting that sometimes people are quiet and that doesn't mean they're shy or stupid and sometimes people forget birthdays, but that doesn't mean they're uncaring. Sometimes people find small talk utterly dull and that's ok, not all of us like the same things. And to be fair, small talk is utterly dull! Can't see the point when there are so many actually interesting things to talk about! :D

Children
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