I've never been good at fitting in

Thanks! I'm trying, but it's not easy after years of masking.

“Why do you want to “fit in” ? Being autistic is what makes you who you are, an individual. There is nobody else like you” - Thats what a NT friend said to me.

People will accept you the way you are and if they don’t then that is on them. if you think about it on the outside we see these clicks of people, groups that are alike yet we don’t know how much they struggle to fit in within their peers. At least we accept we are different. 

Why change yourself? We as society need to be welcoming of those square pegs. I like square pegs, I'm becoming more proud of my right and wrong angles. I hope you can too

I feel like that too. Like a fraud or impostor a lot of the time, that I'm trying to "pass" as someone I'm not. I know I've posted a lot here lately, but I still feel "Oh, well, I'm not really a valued member. I probably irritate people, if I'm honest."

I also have a multifaceted personal identity and always focus on the bit that doesn't fit in in a given situation (such as being Jewish here, or being autistic at synagogue).

Honestly, though, I think people do value your contributions. I find this a welcoming place, on the whole.

I have a lot of forums I belong to . I go on some more regularly than others. FB and Twitter also take up a lot of time. 

I have a version of this too. Started a whole thread about it once, so anomalous did I feel. But I wasn’t once people started showing up to say ‘me too’. Not the majority, but enough. I hope this thread can do the same for you. It’s been great to see you active in here again firemonkey, and I do know how you feel even if in some respects that doesn’t show up front. 

Some seem to easily manage it; even with the diagnosis. They're self assured and confident in a way that I could never be.

Totally relate to this your not alone