Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, I come from the other side of the coin, I’m male and autistic, my wife is allistic. My children are now adults, I struggled so much, I didn’t know I am autistic then. The daily going through the motions was hell on earth. Autistic people often need space, we can’t be caged animals. It’s brilliant that you are so engaged, it must be hard for your children. Have you thought about selling up or just swapping to a more rural area if you are in social housing. A space for your partner is what she craves, I used to think the walls were closing in on me.
Thank you, Roy. The thing is we will probably need to think creatively. If I knew about all this 10 years ago, we would have moved to the country and buy a house. But now, the older son is soon 21 and so I guess in a few years, he'll be on his own. In the mean time we're probably need to find temporary solution for my wife. At least that is what I find reasonble. Kind regards, Mark
Thanks Roy. You don't even know how much these thoughtful comments and experiences mean to me. Mark
Yes hindsight is wonderful thing, my eldest son is 26 and has moved out, my youngest is 21 and rarely at home, it’s lowered the stress levels so much, also there are empty rooms now that I can escape to. I use noise cancelling earphones quite a lot, just someone scraping plates into a bin can be hell. It’s a shame your wife can’t engage with autism yet, one day she might. I think for now her own place is most probably the way to go. It’s not as if she can’t still spend time with you. Hope you find a solution that suits you all.