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Growing Up and Age

H_Pcats

For context, I am 17 nearly 18 years old and I am really scared of becoming an adult. I don't know if it is because of my autism or the fact most of my teenage years were spent with covid. 

As a child, I seemed mentally ahead of my years and seemed to grow up really quickly. But since becoming a teenager I started to seem younger than my peers, especially so recently. I still feel about 15 yet my 18th Birthday is in a few weeks. Everyone else seems to be growing up and keen to leave home and school and start driving and being independent. Yet I don't feel anywhere ready for that. I still want to be a kid and be in school and everything seems to have gone too fast. I am in desperate need of advice and if anyone else felt/feels the same and how they coped with it.

Parents

  • Let me guess? It's like they've done it all lost interest and moved on to other things? It they've done it with people at least. All of those key moments of growing up ... you haven't done them, or had to do them alone?

    A cogent example. Have you heard of the endless 8? Its a story arc about a quirky smart school girl with super powers she is unaware of. And one day her friends start getting this awful feeling of deja vu. That things happened before. Until they confirm it. They are stuck in a time loop with the school holidays repeating over and over for thousands of years with their memories erased on the last day of holiday each time. And she's doing it, this quirky girl, subconsciously with out realising it, she doesn't want the holiday to end.

    So they start trying every fun activity they can think of to make her feel satisfied, to feel like she can move on from this holiday, but nothing works. Until one of them gets frustrated that they've had no time to study for tests in the new term and forces her to help them study. And that works. She was too smart to ever need help studying so she never needed to study in a group. But it was an ordinary right of passage she didn't want to leave school without experiencing.

    What's the point of this long winded allegory? I'm guessing your friends have had more of a social life than you did and gone through many 'rights of passage' that you haven't. And with out that your school days don't feel complete.

    People make bucket lists. Maybe some of us should make "rights of passage" lists and start ticking them off as and when we can, even if the world deems that they are no longer 'age appropriate.'

Reply

  • Let me guess? It's like they've done it all lost interest and moved on to other things? It they've done it with people at least. All of those key moments of growing up ... you haven't done them, or had to do them alone?

    A cogent example. Have you heard of the endless 8? Its a story arc about a quirky smart school girl with super powers she is unaware of. And one day her friends start getting this awful feeling of deja vu. That things happened before. Until they confirm it. They are stuck in a time loop with the school holidays repeating over and over for thousands of years with their memories erased on the last day of holiday each time. And she's doing it, this quirky girl, subconsciously with out realising it, she doesn't want the holiday to end.

    So they start trying every fun activity they can think of to make her feel satisfied, to feel like she can move on from this holiday, but nothing works. Until one of them gets frustrated that they've had no time to study for tests in the new term and forces her to help them study. And that works. She was too smart to ever need help studying so she never needed to study in a group. But it was an ordinary right of passage she didn't want to leave school without experiencing.

    What's the point of this long winded allegory? I'm guessing your friends have had more of a social life than you did and gone through many 'rights of passage' that you haven't. And with out that your school days don't feel complete.

    People make bucket lists. Maybe some of us should make "rights of passage" lists and start ticking them off as and when we can, even if the world deems that they are no longer 'age appropriate.'

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