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Advice need for my son

NAS83915

I’m after some advice for my 18 year old son. He was diagnosed as high functioning autistic 2 years ago. He is very socially awkward, he has no friends he sees outside of his college and will not speak to anyone unless they speak to him first. Because of this he’s very lonely and it’s starting to show.

Last year he was also diagnosed with a condition called ankylosing spondylitis and now has to take 2 weekly injections of a biologic drug which suppresses his immune system. Since then he has more down days, understandably. He’s a very intelligent boy and has been accepted recently to several universities.  I’m worried about the future and his social anxieties. Is there anyone in a like minded situation that could offer advice or could someone point me in the direction of someone he could perhaps talk to please?

  • Are you sure he is lonely? Has he ever had friends? Does he actually want them? Or is it you that thinks he needs or wants them? If he’s willing, he could try CBT for social anxiety. It might give him some pointers and ways to start conversations without the onus being on him.

    You could look for local groups, where he could attend meet ups on a regular basis with like minded individuals. It may bring him out of his shell a little. Doing too much too soon isn’t a good idea though, so talk through things and see if he would like that.

    Sorry to hear about your sons spinal arthritis. I suffer the same type, though it presents slightly different in women. I don’t know how active he use but I really feel that he would benefit from Pilates, or yoga, or body weight exercises to stay flexible and help stave off flares. It is an extremely painful condition, and will affect his mental health. He could sign up to the official AS forum. It can be good to hear from others, or read about things which help.

  • I hope you manage to find some solutions to your issues.

    Some ideas:

    My daughter has Crohns and needs regular hospital treatment and her uni have been very supportive. Perhaps you can discuss this with someone beforehand.

    Universities usually offer support to those with autism.

    There's all sorts of advice on the internet about coping with uni for those with autism. You could search aspergers or HFA at The Student Room where you might students discuss their experiences.  https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk  Also, there are a few articles on this subject that I discovered when I did a search.

    I hope that helps.