Christmas is a struggle

Hello

I have not been diagnosed with autism, but have always felt I don't fit in and am wondering now in later life if it is worth or even possible to try and get a formal diagnosis?  What are your experiences please?  I am a scientist who has no real friendships outside of work and I find it difficult to feel part of any groups and my own family.  I am OK with one on one relationships, but I always need a time limit/exit strategy, so am wondering if this is a recognised sign?  I find Christmas hard every year since I hate family gatherings and know that I will probably upset someone at some point.  I suppose I was hoping that a formal diagnosis might make it easier to explain to people why I don't want to participate - but is that just me looking for excuses?  Is there a reliable way I could self-assess before considering whether to waste anyone's time?

Thank you for listening.

K

Parents
  • My advice if you aren't sure is to take all the free "tests" (they aren't a replacement for a real diagnosis) you can find online from reasonable sources. take every result individualy with some scepticism but look at all of them together and see if there is a pattern,  (I have a feeling you don't need me to explain why as you are a scientist so you probably work with data anyway.) And if you feel strongly about the result you can take that as some starter evidence as well as your own testimony of your personal experiences to a GP and ask for a referal with an intent to diagnose or dismisss whether it might be Autism.
    Also in my experience getting the diagnosis can also be very stigmatising, so it's worth weighing whether the official diagnosis would help you by giving you access to support you actually need or wouldn't actually change anything in a meaningful sense. Because there's also nothing wrong with self diagnosis if you are fairly certain, and going so in "good faith", lack of an official diagnosis doesn't exclude you from autism communities if you feel you get good support here, and feel like going the clinical route would be a bother to you.

Reply
  • My advice if you aren't sure is to take all the free "tests" (they aren't a replacement for a real diagnosis) you can find online from reasonable sources. take every result individualy with some scepticism but look at all of them together and see if there is a pattern,  (I have a feeling you don't need me to explain why as you are a scientist so you probably work with data anyway.) And if you feel strongly about the result you can take that as some starter evidence as well as your own testimony of your personal experiences to a GP and ask for a referal with an intent to diagnose or dismisss whether it might be Autism.
    Also in my experience getting the diagnosis can also be very stigmatising, so it's worth weighing whether the official diagnosis would help you by giving you access to support you actually need or wouldn't actually change anything in a meaningful sense. Because there's also nothing wrong with self diagnosis if you are fairly certain, and going so in "good faith", lack of an official diagnosis doesn't exclude you from autism communities if you feel you get good support here, and feel like going the clinical route would be a bother to you.

Children
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