Published on 12, July, 2020
I just revisited Jodie Smitten's excellent site and found this cluster of articles and info on school attendance - often an issue for parents and certainly an issue within my own family over at least 2 generations. Drilling down into the reasons can be quite emotional too. I was thinking at first that it might be more suitable for the Parents and Carers section but then, and especially after the school reports thread, I reconsidered. Reading through some of this, like thinking about my old school reports, set off quite a bit of reflection on my own schooling, much of which damaged or distorted me and influenced my behaviours for some considerable time. It's all still very much with me, in fact, like a voice in my head. I was always able to attend school myself, but I'm thinking now that the cost might have been too great. It also led to an awful lot of masking, some fairly negative behaviours and consequences for me, plus an almost neverending drive towards perfectionism and getting 10/10, no matter what I had to do to achieve it. :( And yes, although it can be a large "turning circle", I'm on to it now, with more insight, I think. :) If you feel OK to share here, how do you all feel about all of this? www.jodiesmitten.co.uk/school-attendance
I attended school, though I sometimes feigned illness to attempt to avoid it. I hated school with a vengeance, and feared it. I did well academically, once my bouts of selective mutism disappeared at seven years old; I cannot imagine how much worse it would have been if I had had significantly less academic ability. I think that the threat of corporal punishment - the strap - particularly traumatised me. As an autistic child with heightened sensory difficulties around touch, being touched by others and having debilitating tactile revulsions, the threat of being hit on the hands with a thick leather strap, wielded by a grown man, appalled me. I think trauma is not too extreme a word to apply.
Again, this sounds all too familiar to me, especially feigning illness. I didn't do it very often, but knowing that I could was very helpful. And the threat of corporal punishment was frightening to me too, especially since kids would be hauled out of their group at assembly and caned in front of everyone else. Disgusting!