I have a few autism symptoms, that were a lot stronger when I was younger.

• I used to eating the same food everyday (that had to be prepared by the same person). I still do that but nowadays I can eat food prepared by different people.

• always had to used the same silverware, the same cups and plates.

• watched the same movie several times. Nowadays I don’t do that but i listen to the same music repeatedly.

• dislike of loud noises ( like music in parties) and strong smells ( sometimes I would even vomit because of it), which I still do nowadays

• I would not play with my toys but only organize them.

• I had an obsession with animals, which I spent years on, making lists of classifications and memorizing names. I had the same thing for country names and flags and learning new languages . Nowadays I still have this sometimes, but the obsessions are much shorter. Currently I’m obsessed with finding out if Im autistic or not.

• I stim a lot ( rock back and forth , spinning , flapping).

• I hate being touched in certain parts of my body (wrist, forearm and chest) and i hate affection. I refuse to have romantic or sexual relationships. If anyone develops any kind of attraction for me then I immediately panic.

-  I don’t know how to say stuff like happy birthday to people. So I usually don’t say anything. It also took me some years to learn what to speak during online conversations.

• I’m very nervous when doing something for the first time, like traveling.

• I used not care about friendships or relationships at all. That includes having very few friends and not missing them at all.

Nowadays (after starting taking anxiety medication) I have a lot of friends and social skills that I considered to be very good, until someone i know told me I am a nosy person that ask way too many inappropriate questions ( things I had never noticed before) and that I could be autistic. this is the reason Im writing this.

I thought about booking an appointment with a psychologist in order to test if I’m autistic or not, but I’m kinda of embarrassed of doing that and telling my parents about it. Im not sure if I should do that or not.

I should also mention that I have ocd and suspect I had odd ( oppositional defiant disorder) as a child. Could these symptoms be caused by these?