Published on 12, July, 2020
Today, after a few wobbly days at work, I have asked for a meeting with my management team to discuss the reasonable adjustments that can be made to better accommodate my needs in the workplace.
For the past 11 years in my role, I have put my needs second and, at times, I have genuinely struggled to get through it.
This was a huge step for me, but being part of this community has helped me to see the importance of advocating for myself.
2 years ago, when I received my diagnosis, I was quick to brush aside the idea of adjustments. After all, I’d survived up until that point. But I’ve since learned that that approach simply wasn’t good enough, especially considering the amount of meltdowns I was experiencing at the end of a day.
I got quite upset and tearful in the discussion when asking for the meeting, as I think it was in recognition of the 11 years of work up to this point where I have just been coping rather than thriving. But I did it. It took a lot of courage for me, as historically I’ve not been good at asking for help. But I managed it.
The date is pencilled in, and now I get to have a good think in preparation for this meeting. My aim is to now think of my context, the adjustments that can reasonably be in this role and what I’m actually asking for.
I don’t really know why I’m posting this, but it feels good to write it down. I’m sure many of you can relate to that feeling here.
Yep. And well done.
Sometimes simple things make all the difference.
Sometimes NT don't know what thoes simple things are - not their fault, their world is different - and we must spell it out.
But once you can say, I need this, you need that, how can we do both, if both sides are on board, finally we are on a winner.
Good luck with your meeting.
Thank you.
It started to feel simpler during the meetings. Beforehand, not so much. I’d built up the pressure on myself to seem almost insurmountable. As these things so often turn out to be, direct and clear communication (which relies on both parties) was the trick. I should have asked years ago, but I didn’t have the courage or the self-esteem to feel worthy of it. My mindset is changing slightly.
Now it’s just a case of time and space for processing.
Time and Space. This is all I ever ask for.
Not only that, it is genuinely what I want.