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Family Don't Understand

British Guy

I'm really stressed and struggling with things at the moment and my family aren't helping much. I get a lot of pain, stomach upsets and anxiety and whenever I tell my family they always say the same thing you're overthinking things and it's in your head. They never even hear me out or consider how I'm feeling and how these things affect me. I've tried explaining in words and through writing but they still don't believe and understand. I want to see a doctor about the stomach upsets and pain but don't want to go alone but they won't come with because they don't think there's anything wrong. I've tried to explain to them about autism and digestive issues but they don't believe it.

At a loss here don't know how to help them understand.

  • I suffer chronic stomach pains. My mother called me an insult to autistic people.. but either way my mother has been there reguarding my stomach as she seen it can bring me to tears. I’ve still no diagnosis with my stomach, but I’ve had cameras up and down inside me.. scans and what have you.. no answers.. sweet cheese it hurts 

  • I'm sorry your family don't understand. There's not much you can do about that except explain and hope one day their minds will open.

    Meanwhile, oh boy do I get the apprehensions about GPs. And you are of course right that we are super susceptible to digestive problems which need to be taken seriously.

    In the absence of family support to get into the surgery there are a few things you could try. You could try writing ahead of an appointment to outline the problem and explain what will be difficult for you when you come. And/or you could try an advocate. MIND will tell you who serves your area. They would meet with you before hand, go with you and communicate for you if need be. It's a free service.

    Either way, your GP probably needs to make a double appointment and take their time over the communication.

  • in reply to Luna

    Thank you, that worked. Guess I should have tried that...

  • in reply to AuTriker

    If you press the More button below your posts you should be able to edit it I think.

  • in reply to AuTriker

    Is there no way to edit a post on this forum? Ah, there is! Thanks Luna.

    Anyway, I was (over)thinking my response and wanted to clarify that in no way do I think it is OK to bribe one's family to do what they ought to do! But it was a pragmatic suggestion with the hope first that it would shame them into doing what they ought and at the very least would achieve the object even in a non-ideal way.

  • "You can't spell families without lies!" (Four Christmases)

  • It really annoys me when people say "it's all in your head" like that means you can fix it yourself! Even if it is in your head, you still need help fixing that! So maybe try saying to them something like - OK if you're right and it's all in my head, can you please help me fix my head by coming to the dr with me? Then hopefully the dr can give you help with both the digestive issues and the annoying family! Or can you find someone else to go to the dr with you?

    If the family are the only option and they still won't help, can you try some other way of getting one to go with you, like saying you'll do the dishes for a week if they go with you or some other transaction, even paying them if you can afford it?