Is this PDA?

I'm 28 years old and got my diagnosis two months ago. I have been reading up about PDA and I feel like a lot of it fits me - I hate being told or asked to do things, even if it was something I was planning to do anyway I will no longer want to do it if someone asks me to.

Something that seems related to this is that I hate people making assumptions about me, especially if they are right. I would rather someone make a wrong assumption that is more "embarrassing" than that they assume correctly - I'm not sure if that makes sense? And I particularly dislike if someone anticipates my emotional response to something, and changes the way they speak to me as a result. For example this morning my girlfriend told me she won't be spending Christmas with me this year, and when she told me she held my hand and changed her tone of voice to speak more "gently", and for some reason it really irritated me. 

Writing it out now it seems super petty and irrational, but it's something I have noticed before (with other people, not just her) and it consistently bugs me.

Can anyone else relate? And do you think this is a PDA thing? Like the expected emotional response becomes a demand? It's annoying and I'd like to figure out a way to get over this if I can.

Parents
  • Yes, I can relate - but ironically - I tend to agree with JuniperFromGallifrey in relation to what you have described above.  Perhaps you have a larger component of PDA traits in your ASD profile to most, but the way you describe them does not lead me to believe that you are predominantly PDA.  Keep watch however!  You are only 28 and "regression" is a thing.

Reply
  • Yes, I can relate - but ironically - I tend to agree with JuniperFromGallifrey in relation to what you have described above.  Perhaps you have a larger component of PDA traits in your ASD profile to most, but the way you describe them does not lead me to believe that you are predominantly PDA.  Keep watch however!  You are only 28 and "regression" is a thing.

Children
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