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I don't know how to live independently and have no idea where to start

NAS81329

Hello. This is a very difficult point of my life because I am finding myself having to move away from family. Family life has become increasingly hostile and abusive recently and feel like there's no other choice but to get out. I don't know about anything involved with this, I was never given this sort of help or guidance, just things like "oh we'll look after you"-type comments from family over the years.

I have tried to contact my local support group for autistic adults but they did not respond to my email. I feel like either the support just isn't there or that maybe I am not being taken seriously because of my age (I am in my early 30's now). I would prefer to avoid the telephone if possible because that is extremely uncomfortable and stressful for me to use. There are no other family members I can reach out to and no friends in the country to turn to. I don't have my own money and I don't have my own vehicle, with my current location being very rural I feel quite literally trapped with no options.

What else can I do at this point?

Parents

  • Thanks for the responses. I'll try to address the parts I understand.

    Mariusz said:
    I live alone, it's not easy, I wouldn't make it without 30h per week job + UC. you need money to live alone on your own terms. or if working is to much apply for council housing

    I would like to work if I can. I don't know enough about benefits or what I'd be able to get though, the last time I applied for that sort of thing (was just after I left school) I was refused anything. Don't remember why, was a long time ago now.

    I Sperg said:
    If you live rural, you'll already probably have a function in the community, if not, then find one!

    I don't, it's a very remote area. Not even in any of the villages. There aren't even any footpaths.

    I Sperg said:

    Try not to pay rent or get a mortgage, if you can. You can try the citizens advice bureau, it's a pain to get an appointment, BUT a phrase similar to "I am Autistic and facing a housing emergency and do not know what to do" should elicit a fair response. 

    They will want to ow WHY you can no longer stay in the family home.

    But if you can find your own creative solution where you can both distance yourself fro but still remain a part of your family.

    But whatever you do, try and be as kind about your family members as you can when highlighting the very real problems that you clearly have.

    I haven't heard of this place before. Is it better to contact a local branch or just the organisation in general?

    I appreciate that you're trying to suggest ways to stay part of the family in some ways, but it is difficult to trust them anymore because of things they have done. To your last sentence, I generally don't want to focus things on complaining about them since I'm more focused on just finding the help that I need, but when they do such things like intercept my mail I would prefer to distance myself from them and not let them have any sort of control.

  • in reply to NAS81329

    citizens advice bureau is UK organisation with offices in bigger cities https://g.co/kgs/o9FpVS

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