Attention to thoughts

It’s why I really admire the autistic brain for being able to create connections so instantly, but I think it’s due to that skill that the social side can be tricky sometimes too. Everything thought related seems to be intense and quick, for me at least, and I really enjoy exploring a thought properly. It just has to happen then and there is all- so, sorry conversation, you’ve been demoted in priority!

Me too. I also find it difficult if others don't obviously show they are listening to me. I think other people can listen and do a task but I cannot and so expect this of other people because it's how I communicate. 

Similarly I can't converse and do a task at the same time. But many people expect me to.

It's creating a knot on a string

Oakling said:

. If something is said that inspires a thought or creates a connection, I have to explore it, but that makes keeping up with the conversation difficult

Omg yes! And then by the time I've filtered through and formulated my response, conversation has moved on.

for me as well, to focus on listening I cannot do anything else, and I need to be facing the person

Yes me too. But I do feel that once I've made a decision, I don't really think back to how things could've been had I made a different choice. I just get on with whatever has been decided. I find from talking to others, they reach a decision more quickly but then mull over or ruminate about it afterwards. I ferl I'm the opposite and do all that first. I think it's because I am detail orientated so need all information before I can reach a decision.

This is an interesting thing to consider. My mind is always active it seems, so something focusing on the right thought can sometimes be an issue. It seems I can talk myself out of a lot of things due to this too, if I give myself too much time to think about something. 

I also wonder if this is why I struggle in conversations sometimes too. If something is said that inspires a thought or creates a connection, I have to explore it, but that makes keeping up with the conversation difficult. It then becomes impossible if many conversations are happening in the room.

yes, without hyperactive bit, it's easy to take one for the other and the other way around

I do have hyperactive bit

summer time totally out of control;

if the probability of choice is evenly spread you can get stuck too

I did write sometime ago here,: Autistic holygrail - the 3rd invisible choice, as a solution to that problem

Yes I have experienced this to the point where I just walk off no choice made. Or I pick something up, carry it around with me then put it back right at the end. I do that a lot. I know some of it is probably to do with "too much choice".

I think this is why it takes me forever to do certain tasks at work.  If I have to choose from numerous resources, it's like I don't know where to start or how to filter through.  I've seen other people spend far less time by just making a choice and going with it.

On the other hand, if it's a decision about something big, to do with the house, and I'm with my partner, a decision can be reached fairly quickly but it's a different mindset. (Does it really matter what shade of white the wardrobes are? No, it's just practical stuff... so decision is made).

imagine quipu

your thoughts are like strings in quipu

when you add a conclusion to particular chain of thoughts, you make a knot on a particular string, they all flow with you through time, and behind you turn into your memories

don't forgot to crossreference for stability and easier finding /locating

I imagine it like that, to instill some order

I have many thoughts at any one time. I did think I might have ADHD at one point, for various reasons including this. However, on describing things to my psychologist, it seems I have a ‘busy brain’. That sounds about right. I also struggle to make decisions. There are too many options and different conclusions.

The closed loop is another one I know well. I get that in the supermarket sometimes, I can stand frozen staring at an isle for ages because there seems to be a valid reason not to buy every single thing I'm trying to choose from and the same logic goes through my mind in  a loop on repeat if that makes sense

I know exactly what you mean. I always liken it to a slideshow going constantly through my head and each thought is a different slide whizzing past me. Almost like a conveyor belt of thoughts. And its hard to know what to focus on 

I refer to that phenomena - a closed loop - to many contradicting restrictions making all choices invalid

but there is solution, ask to confirm if they override all previous orders/ restrictions, dressed in some nice words 

e.g. I do as I'm told, what do you want me to do?

I have no choice about what I'm doing it's managerss who decide, ask them, unless you want to decide?

worse if it's actually inside your head

do you remember my post about Mr Confused, Mr Paranoid, Badger and Diplomat?

 Do you have enough time to follow up on all of them? then order doesn't matter