Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, I finally realised that I’m autistic in December, I was fine about it for a couple of weeks and doing a lot of research. I then one day had an unexpected appointment thrust upon me which caused one of the worst meltdowns that I have ever had. It was the full 4 horsemen of the apocalypse. I couldn’t get out of bed for 48 hours. That was six months ago, since then I’ve just been constantly tired and have no interest in anything, I’m self employed and just can’t engage with my work. It’s as if I’m drowning. I’ve been processing every thought of the last 50 years, I seem to fit adhd as well, my mind is always at Mach 2, I have never been able to sit still and anxiety is 24/7. I’m on the waiting list for an asd assessment, not knowing the time span is driving me mad, I’m actually thinking of selling the family house so I can get a private assessment. I’ve cut down on work as I can’t manage taking very much at the moment. I tried antidepressants but felt no different. Any ideas people?
There are remedies for burnout, and worth googling and learning about things that might help.
My advice is work towards having healthy thoughts and mindset, take your mind off troubles and focus only on tasks you need to. Mindfulness is useful, but just distracting yourself can help, as can living in the present is really important - go for a walk and focus outside your mind, no judgements of anything around including people. Being at one/peace with yourself and things is good generally, so worth working towards.
Excess focus-on-self (and your worries/trauma) is not good, it can trap you in a negative thoughts/feelings - anxiety alone can be crippling, but it can all lift if you are able to live in the moment and think healthily/positively and only about what you need to.
Thoughts from the past can come to you and some might be useful to help you see something in a different light, but others painful, don't dwell on those at all, but appreciate the helpful ones and spend a bit of time thinking about what is revealed.
I would say selling your house is a last resort as the added thinking and stress might not be a good idea, explore other options that are less challenging. If you work on healing then your mind will be clearer and work better, you might be less desperate, and more productive also.
If you have trouble managing thoughts that is worth seeing a psychiatrist about, they can help with medication for that kind of thing, but it also helps to manage thoughts as best you can as well, otherwise you are dependent on the medication and whilst not always addictive, it just means if you want to stop, or feel its time to stop, you will just go back to not managing well again.
lol been there before CBT what a joke lol