The pattern

From what i've seen here everyone has a self loathing element that comes par for the course with the condition including me. From there it may depend on how humiliated we still feel by life & what those coping mechanism are. Speaking on a time scale measured in decades, i certainly feel humiliated by the the way the difference caused by autism, manifested adverse reactions in public. I'm not so sure when it comes to social settings online that the distanced conditions explain ( for instance ) why i do not get much response either. In that sense i'd feel there are too many natural degrees of freedom ( in expression ) based on ordinary reasons as to why some group together more & exchange more. Certainly feelings of isolation cam be driven by long term experience that has hurt us & socially humiliated us. Perhaps this is where that can either cross over into us loathing ourselves or not in accordance to how much we might embrace human values - here particularly in the personal sense of valuing ourselves. Furthermore that self evaluation is best not linked to the last third of life so that we batter ourselves about age, and having been held back in life and so on. It is easy to feel that disadvantage did all that & will put us in our box with two fingers up at us & we best avoid that negative emotion ( even though it might in many ways ) So maybe the mirror images of ourselves needs to come back as an implicit self worth & not one lining to such wide variables in the explicit. Because if the outbound experience always has control of our emotions, the potentials for us to be less kind to ourselves with regulation issues is probably greatly enhanced. What after all would happen should be become highly popular suddenly  - would our self efficacy increase at the neurological level ?

From what i've seen here everyone has a self loathing element that comes par for the course with the condition including me. From there it may depend on how humiliated we still feel by life & what those coping mechanism are. Speaking on a time scale measured in decades, i certainly feel humiliated by the the way the difference caused by autism, manifested adverse reactions in public. I'm not so sure when it comes to social settings online that the distanced conditions explain ( for instance ) why i do not get much response either. In that sense i'd feel there are too many natural degrees of freedom ( in expression ) based on ordinary reasons as to why some group together more & exchange more. Certainly feelings of isolation cam be driven by long term experience that has hurt us & socially humiliated us. Perhaps this is where that can either cross over into us loathing ourselves or not in accordance to how much we might embrace human values - here particularly in the personal sense of valuing ourselves. Furthermore that self evaluation is best not linked to the last third of life so that we batter ourselves about age, and having been held back in life and so on. It is easy to feel that disadvantage did all that & will put us in our box with two fingers up at us & we best avoid that negative emotion ( even though it might in many ways ) So maybe the mirror images of ourselves needs to come back as an implicit self worth & not one lining to such wide variables in the explicit. Because if the outbound experience always has control of our emotions, the potentials for us to be less kind to ourselves with regulation issues is probably greatly enhanced. What after all would happen should be become highly popular suddenly  - would our self efficacy increase at the neurological level ?

Grubby said:

Furthermore that self evaluation is best not linked to the last third of life so that we batter ourselves about age, and having been held back in life and so on.

That's something I struggle with.