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communication

abloner

I usually lose any control of myself if I plunge in a conversation with somebody. Some short exchanges are structurally short lived (like with a shopkeeper, or if you ask an information to a passerby in the street). But if the conversation has some consistence and durance I lose completely control and I need often a long time to reconstruct the bubble in which I live (in which I only may live). One technique I employ with some success is to devote myself to solitaries for some time after quitting the exchange. As solitaries (free cell for example) engage the left hemisphere only, I hypothesize that engaging the left hemisphere I may put the right one at work to rebuild my emotional bubble. I may suggest that this is one reason for which people in the autistic spectrum tend to “lecture” others. Lecturing others about some subject you think you know well avoids dialogue and maintains your false “integrity”.

Parents

  • That is one of the hazards - that we are forced to become recluses and only interact very formally in very practiced ways. So many bad experiences mean trust is hard to sustain.

    Being diagnosed very late in life I didn't know what caused me problems, and my response was to keep trying. I've met others on the spectrum with the same philosophy. Although I find social situations uncomfortable I seem to manage better if I have a role to play, which can be acted out, and doesn't need so much self defence when not as good as others at doing so. So I got involved in committees, in volunteering, in anything that got me out there with people.

    Yes I get hurt a lot. I'm too trusting, too gullible and cannot read between the lines fast enough when people are taking advantage of me. I appear more gullible than I am, so I'm always conscious that people may be starting from the premise of what they can get away with.

    I am conscious though of having mild aspergers and being lucky, and don't want to suggest that everyone can do this. But I think some degree of outgoing and effort to interact is needed to avoid isolation. Even if it is hard and lots of disappointments.

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  • That is one of the hazards - that we are forced to become recluses and only interact very formally in very practiced ways. So many bad experiences mean trust is hard to sustain.

    Being diagnosed very late in life I didn't know what caused me problems, and my response was to keep trying. I've met others on the spectrum with the same philosophy. Although I find social situations uncomfortable I seem to manage better if I have a role to play, which can be acted out, and doesn't need so much self defence when not as good as others at doing so. So I got involved in committees, in volunteering, in anything that got me out there with people.

    Yes I get hurt a lot. I'm too trusting, too gullible and cannot read between the lines fast enough when people are taking advantage of me. I appear more gullible than I am, so I'm always conscious that people may be starting from the premise of what they can get away with.

    I am conscious though of having mild aspergers and being lucky, and don't want to suggest that everyone can do this. But I think some degree of outgoing and effort to interact is needed to avoid isolation. Even if it is hard and lots of disappointments.

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