communication

I usually lose any control of myself if I plunge in a conversation with somebody. Some short exchanges are structurally short lived (like with a shopkeeper, or if you ask an information to a passerby in the street). But if the conversation has some consistence and durance I lose completely control and I need often a long time to reconstruct the bubble in which I live (in which I only may live). One technique I employ with some success is to devote myself to solitaries for some time after quitting the exchange. As solitaries (free cell for example) engage the left hemisphere only, I hypothesize that engaging the left hemisphere I may put the right one at work to rebuild my emotional bubble. I may suggest that this is one reason for which people in the autistic spectrum tend to “lecture” others. Lecturing others about some subject you think you know well avoids dialogue and maintains your false “integrity”.

Parents
  • My experience is that routine formal conversation, where language is in control, is fine (though it wasn't when I was young) but is has improved because I work hard at it and act up - learning expressions and mannerisms that make me sound better. (I used to be good in print and disappointing in person but that has improved over time).

    Where I experience disproportionate amounts of difficulty is where more than one person is involved, where there is more "body language" and inferential unspoken activity, also where lots of people are speaking at the same time or there is competing sound. I have a massive battle to keep on track, I lose the thread easily, I get tired easily, and the more stressful it gets the less I understand and the more gaffs I make. I find it easier on social occasions to stand near a wall, so the sound comes at me from one direction.

    I think therefore that the tendency to lecture people, from my perspective, is that language based communication is vastly easier, and I just cannot do the nudge nudge know what I mean, gaze directed, eye contact thing. I think its what I know best rather than specifically avoiding dialogue. I have to try hard not to talk at people because believe me, that's where things really go wrong, my voice gets louder and the world around me fades out - dangerous stuff -

Reply
  • My experience is that routine formal conversation, where language is in control, is fine (though it wasn't when I was young) but is has improved because I work hard at it and act up - learning expressions and mannerisms that make me sound better. (I used to be good in print and disappointing in person but that has improved over time).

    Where I experience disproportionate amounts of difficulty is where more than one person is involved, where there is more "body language" and inferential unspoken activity, also where lots of people are speaking at the same time or there is competing sound. I have a massive battle to keep on track, I lose the thread easily, I get tired easily, and the more stressful it gets the less I understand and the more gaffs I make. I find it easier on social occasions to stand near a wall, so the sound comes at me from one direction.

    I think therefore that the tendency to lecture people, from my perspective, is that language based communication is vastly easier, and I just cannot do the nudge nudge know what I mean, gaze directed, eye contact thing. I think its what I know best rather than specifically avoiding dialogue. I have to try hard not to talk at people because believe me, that's where things really go wrong, my voice gets louder and the world around me fades out - dangerous stuff -

Children
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