Support Groups for High Functioning Autism/Asperger Adults who are

In my area I’ve found a service that claims to be for autistic adults of all levels of functioning but is almost exclusively used by low functioning autistic people and understandably has catered to this majority. When you look at the intersection of high functioning and adult there is almost no support in the community.

I think part of it is the assumption is made that high functioning autistic people could organise their own stuff if they wanted to. But high functioning autistic people tend to have really restricted interests and wouldn’t be too interested in putting effort into organising something that didn’t centre on one of those interests.

For example I personally have tried in the past to organise an anime club and a science club for people in general, not just autism, and couldn't drum up enough interest in these activities. I'd happily run an anime club or science club for autistic adults, but if it was an interest based group why keep the non autistic people out? And if its not centred around one of my interests I'm not sure I'd find it that exciting I'd want to pour time and energy into it.

Autism groups are often run by parents who's focus is their kid with special needs. It's feels more like a necessity to them. The problems faced in their lives motivate them to help others with similar problems. The problems I've faced are neurotypicals excluding me from groups that used to be very autism friendly and have more than their fair share of autistic members which have since become unsafe spaces for autistic people where they can be pilloried for giving minor unintentional offence. That's what I'm passionate about. It's why I'm working on the areyoualien.uk project. But the kind of support we offer is specifically about standing up for yourself when you experience discrimination. We're not a social group or anything like that.

I’m sorry you’ve had that experience of feeling excluded - that horrible. Why are people so unkind? 

I agree with the points you’ve made - most of the support is aimed at people with more obvious challenges from autism and people with learning difficulties. There is a lack of understanding that more ‘high functioning’ (I know that term is not ideal but for want of a better one i will use it) also need support at times. They need a place to go, a source of support. For example my eldest is incredibly intelligent and went to Oxford Uni - on the surface of it people assume he’s doing great and super capable. But he’s actually had some really severe difficulties in many ways relating to his autistic traits - and even though he’s had responsible and decently paid jobs he’s found the transition into the workplace hugely stressful and difficult. He can do the WORK - no problem - it’s all the other aspects that are difficult for him - the social side, the struggle with maintaining focus and concentration on the aspects of the job that don’t interest him, etc. He was near to a nervous breakdown at one point due to trying so hard to fit in to a workplace that was really toxic. He couldn’t relate to any of the people he was working with at all, but made a huge effort to fit in with them and it was exhausting him trying to do that. But all my wider family assume he’s doing brilliantly just because he went to Oxford Uni. They have no idea how being autistic impacts on a person. People don’t understand that it’s very complex - many autistic people can appear fine on the outside but they can be on the verge of collapse mentally and emotionally. 

I’m sorry you’ve had that experience of feeling excluded - that horrible. Why are people so unkind? 

I agree with the points you’ve made - most of the support is aimed at people with more obvious challenges from autism and people with learning difficulties. There is a lack of understanding that more ‘high functioning’ (I know that term is not ideal but for want of a better one i will use it) also need support at times. They need a place to go, a source of support. For example my eldest is incredibly intelligent and went to Oxford Uni - on the surface of it people assume he’s doing great and super capable. But he’s actually had some really severe difficulties in many ways relating to his autistic traits - and even though he’s had responsible and decently paid jobs he’s found the transition into the workplace hugely stressful and difficult. He can do the WORK - no problem - it’s all the other aspects that are difficult for him - the social side, the struggle with maintaining focus and concentration on the aspects of the job that don’t interest him, etc. He was near to a nervous breakdown at one point due to trying so hard to fit in to a workplace that was really toxic. He couldn’t relate to any of the people he was working with at all, but made a huge effort to fit in with them and it was exhausting him trying to do that. But all my wider family assume he’s doing brilliantly just because he went to Oxford Uni. They have no idea how being autistic impacts on a person. People don’t understand that it’s very complex - many autistic people can appear fine on the outside but they can be on the verge of collapse mentally and emotionally.