Why can’t you just be like the other children? Late diagnosed or self diagnosed adults, Can we forgive parents?

Excellent post Roy.

As you say, for a lot of us, very little was known about Autism when we were children. Our traits were all too often misunderstood. I understand why, but sometimes I find it hard not to feel a sense of resentment.

Had more been known about Autism when I was a child, might I have been treated with more understanding by my parents, relatives, teachers, and people in general? I think it's natural to ponder these things. Of course, none of us will ever know if our lives might have turned out differently if there had been more knowledge about Autism.

I personally can understand your inability to forgive your mother, but that probably has a lot to do with the fact that I have a rather difficult relationship with my own mother.

At age 52, I’ve come to see my Autism as being God’s Punishment for being disobedient to parents in childhood, as all parental Authority comes from God, even if my parents because of thier own issues did not know how to be parents and even if they should not have been allowed to bring a child into the world and were considered unsuitable for Marriage, where both their and both my grandparents marriages on both sides of my family were disapproved of for whatever reasons in the Catholic Ireland of the time and according to Catholic Social Teachings - had I been taught (and properly understood) my Catholic faith better in childhood, I might well have been a model child, even if I’d been taken off my parents (which I now realise I should have been) and sent to live with my grandparents family and/or sent to live with Nuns in a Convent, as my grandparents before they passed in the 1980’s remained hugely concerned at my upbringing, as thier belief was that a “harsh” childhood with ultra strict discipline results in stronger adults, which was something I never had, so I was unable to “cop myself on” and (properly) grow up, while “falling into sin” in my teenage years as an only child, in choosing the gay path in the process, which I only realised 15 years ago after I returned to my faith after I cut all ties with that lifestyle, that was never considered appropriate by anyone in my particular case, given my only child background and the situation with my parents - I only share these things on here to help others, especially young people and to avoid making the same mistakes that I made - and my lived life experiences are textbook in helping others, especially children, in our times - unlike homosexuality, despite the parallels, only Autism is mainly a genetic condition, aside from any other causes of autism like childhood vaccines, parenting, etc 

It's really sad you've been made to feel that way - about all of it. I hope one day you'll feel the same love and compassion and accceptance for yourself as Jesus would have shown you.

Well okay then, I just wanted to be sure.

You've got your full answer, from me, already. 

I didn't think a big ask Sperg, and a week is plenty long enough considering I don't need an essay response, you still have that 1 DM left under parle terms (bear in mind you DM'ed me first, which I didn't consent to either) it's only by good grace that I didn't consider it as further harrassment after I ws forced to respond to you thusly in another thread:

🐝 Bees 🐝 (they/them) Autism resources in bio #stoptheshock #NothingAboutUsWithoutUs said:

Do not talk to me again, otherwise I will be forced to report you because this inability of yours to let these vivid imaginings go once politely corrected, and I have been nothing but polite til now, is now harassment.

You chose to DM me after that point, and that is what gives me the authority to set terms of our continued interaction.
I pressed for the answer in DM's because it's not fair to be doing this (derailing yet another innocent bystanders thread) yet again.

I Sperg said:

Your "Bambi" suggestion, however was excellent; "If you haven't got anything nice to say, then say nothing".

Let's you and me do our best to stick to that, eh?

Still fine by me if that's what you want to do, I only ask to be notified that's what has been chosen so we can be on the same page. I don't want to make you feel pressured as the choice is yours but I did require answer sooner since you already started to reply to me again on other threads already. It's best if we don't leave these things open to misinterpretation and actually have it done and dusted.

It's a serious response, so I'm not editting out the now obvious misspellings and awkward phrasing, because that could be interpreted as "changing my narrative". Sorry about that. Makes it slightly lumpier reading than it should be. My bad.

Isn't that a little abusive?

You only allowed me to make ONE response under the extensive conditions you set out in your D.M. You further informed me that I needed to THINK about my response and take my time, which I have been doing, and I wrote most of that response yesterday in between other tasks and will now discard, in favour of a public response, since you air the matter in the public arena. (which is good) 

Although I am unsure who gave you the authority to set out demands on how I conduct myself on this forum, I've been twisting myself in knots to find a response that will satisfy your expressions of outrage at my very existence and way of thinking and requirement that I adopt different thinking as you lay out in your five key non negotiable demands. 

IN truth, I cannot, I believe this is a "trust and safeguarding issue" beyond my ability to resolve, and have accordingly decided to just disengage any private communication, forget any hope I may have had at being able to cool things down as far as the problems you've stirred up for yourselves are concerned, and get on with my own business here. I'm not panning to avoid you or give you any special treatment, based on our previous interactions, you are just the same as me, another person on an AUTISM forum.   

Your "Bambi" suggestion, however was excellent; "If you haven't got anything nice to say, then say nothing".

Let's you and me do our best to stick to that, eh?

I come from a Catholic family but I wasn't talking to you, so refrain from talking to me unless you have an answer to the discussion specifically under parle in the DM. ( I won't warn you again.)

You can ask the guys in the big hats and fine robes or your can ask God directly.

Otherwise, good advice..

I know you are knowledgeable about LGBT matters, but do you actually have any working knowledge of Christianity, or any recognised qualifications to support your giving this man spiritual advice?

You can ask the guys in the big hats and fine robes or your can ask God directly.

Otherwise, good advice..

I know you are knowledgeable about LGBT matters, but do you actually have any working knowledge of Christianity, or any recognised qualifications to support your giving this man spiritual advice?

Well okay then, I just wanted to be sure.

You've got your full answer, from me, already. 

I didn't think a big ask Sperg, and a week is plenty long enough considering I don't need an essay response, you still have that 1 DM left under parle terms (bear in mind you DM'ed me first, which I didn't consent to either) it's only by good grace that I didn't consider it as further harrassment after I ws forced to respond to you thusly in another thread:

🐝 Bees 🐝 (they/them) Autism resources in bio #stoptheshock #NothingAboutUsWithoutUs said:

Do not talk to me again, otherwise I will be forced to report you because this inability of yours to let these vivid imaginings go once politely corrected, and I have been nothing but polite til now, is now harassment.

You chose to DM me after that point, and that is what gives me the authority to set terms of our continued interaction.
I pressed for the answer in DM's because it's not fair to be doing this (derailing yet another innocent bystanders thread) yet again.

I Sperg said:

Your "Bambi" suggestion, however was excellent; "If you haven't got anything nice to say, then say nothing".

Let's you and me do our best to stick to that, eh?

Still fine by me if that's what you want to do, I only ask to be notified that's what has been chosen so we can be on the same page. I don't want to make you feel pressured as the choice is yours but I did require answer sooner since you already started to reply to me again on other threads already. It's best if we don't leave these things open to misinterpretation and actually have it done and dusted.

It's a serious response, so I'm not editting out the now obvious misspellings and awkward phrasing, because that could be interpreted as "changing my narrative". Sorry about that. Makes it slightly lumpier reading than it should be. My bad.

Isn't that a little abusive?

You only allowed me to make ONE response under the extensive conditions you set out in your D.M. You further informed me that I needed to THINK about my response and take my time, which I have been doing, and I wrote most of that response yesterday in between other tasks and will now discard, in favour of a public response, since you air the matter in the public arena. (which is good) 

Although I am unsure who gave you the authority to set out demands on how I conduct myself on this forum, I've been twisting myself in knots to find a response that will satisfy your expressions of outrage at my very existence and way of thinking and requirement that I adopt different thinking as you lay out in your five key non negotiable demands. 

IN truth, I cannot, I believe this is a "trust and safeguarding issue" beyond my ability to resolve, and have accordingly decided to just disengage any private communication, forget any hope I may have had at being able to cool things down as far as the problems you've stirred up for yourselves are concerned, and get on with my own business here. I'm not panning to avoid you or give you any special treatment, based on our previous interactions, you are just the same as me, another person on an AUTISM forum.   

Your "Bambi" suggestion, however was excellent; "If you haven't got anything nice to say, then say nothing".

Let's you and me do our best to stick to that, eh?

I come from a Catholic family but I wasn't talking to you, so refrain from talking to me unless you have an answer to the discussion specifically under parle in the DM. ( I won't warn you again.)