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Therapist believes I have autism but I'm unsure

NAS78397

My Cognitive Behavioural Therapist, who works with autistic adults frequently, has said that she believes I have autism. I've been going to her for a while now (around 5 months) and the topic of autism hasn't been brought up before this, but she believes a few things I mentioned in my last session with her has put a few "pieces of the puzzle" together regarding my mental health, and has led her to believe that I have it and that I should arrange to see a psychiatrist.

Honestly, her saying that she believes I have autism was a relief -- I don't feel as though I've ever fit into the boxes people apply to mental health issues such as social anxiety and generalised anxiety, and the way she explained it to me, I could definitely see how it related to me. To put it briefly, the way she explained it to me was that the people who have "regular" anxiety issues won't have a good grasp on what would make them feel better, and then understanding that eventually helps subside the anxiety. I've always known what will make me feel better (in my first session with her I explained that if everyone just understood how my anxiety affected me, I probably wouldn't have anxiety) and exactly why others would perceive my anxieties as "irrational", but knowing that doesn't help me.

So I felt relief after listening to the ways she described the autism spectrum, because for a long time I've just felt that this constant feeling of apprehension, anxiety and distress I have from doing things a regular way that are out of my control was just something that I had that I wouldn't be able to put my finger on. 

But now I've come back and started to research it, and so many of the big signifiers of autism just don't apply to me at all. I've never had issues with eye contact, the apparent telltale signs of a child with autism such as not playing with others, repetitive playing, etc. don't fit me, and stuff like delayed language skills and not knowing how to "pretend" in play couldn't be further from the truth.

I know autism is a spectrum, but when YouTubing high-functioning autism and seeing other people with it, I couldn't relate to a lot of what they were saying. There was always some caveat that "very few people with autism won't have ever struggled with X," but I just think what are the odds that I fit in this box. But then I also think that there may be plenty of people like me, who can't put their finger on while they feel so much discomfort and distress but not to the point where it's debilitating enough to do something about it, so maybe there aren't many people on this side of the spectrum who speak up?

I just wanted some opinions and advice here, and to hopefully find someone who may be in the same boat as I am with this. 

  • Hi Slight smileI know you posted this a while ago now so you may be in a different place with exploring this, but here are some thoughts:

    I never struggled with pretending when I was little either, although I find it almost impossible now. Eye contact wasn’t applicable because I’ve been blind since I was 2. I was usually very engaged in class, and enjoyed performing.

    However, I was very sensitive to certain sounds, textures and smells, and would seek out others. I made very few friends, spent most of my time with adults or on my own, and really struggled to speak in groups. I could go on, but this isn’t about me and you probably get the idea :)Basically, autism can present in countless different ways. My advice would be to look into the strengths that can come with being on the spectrum, as the deficit-focus of much of the available material was alienating for me too. Think about the ability to focus intensely, to form deep interests and knowledge in specific areas, to be incredibly loyal in close friendships, having strong language skills and attention to detail…

    Does any of this resonate? Ultimately, you know yourself best, and it’s ok if none of this speaks to you. Good luck with all your explorations, and I hope you find answers or pathways that work for you :)

  • A therapist better trained in Autism most likely wouldn’t say “you Have autism” but “it’s sounds like you may Be autistic”. One thing worth remarking is the feeing you don’t Relate to the individuals in these videos. I think that’s far more important than the misunderstanding of how autistic children “play” or the misrepresentation of Repetition. 

    NeuroTypical society is riddled with repetition, just in a societal approved manner. 

    have you looked into Freuds defence mechanisms? Oedipalisation and Sublimation? I can say without a doubt, enough money would relieve all my anxiety. In a primitive life we would be anxious about large animals and finding food and feeding our young. Really, not much has changed. 

  • This is interesting because my therapist has said the same thing, I fully believe I am autistic but don't know if I now need to persue a diagnosis because my therapist has confirmed it as it were.

    In terms of not fitting all the criteria, I don't think you have to, I also think that you don't always realise that you have struggled with something because of masking - personally speaking.

  • Hi there. I have autism and bipolar disorder. Welcome to the forum.

    I have only identified myself as autistic for the last few years and do not fit with many aspects with the DSM-V diagnostic features.

    For me, identifying as autistic has meant I can better manage my mental health. It has meant that I look at how my autism affects me and manage it, so that I am less anxious and less depressed. Though I have medication and psychological treatments too.

    Best wishes for your journey.

    Mrs Snooks

  • in reply to Daniel

    What's the best way to approach a diagnosis of some kind? I've heard the waiting list for that kind of thing is huge (or hugely expensive). I'm not entirely sure whether an official diagnosis would be helpful at this stage, but I'd like to know if this is an actual thing I've got or, as you said, my therapist's word. 

    Thank you for the reply!

  • Autism has a lot of symptoms that overlap other conditions, so don’t take your therapist’s word for it. Just assuming you’re autistic because of autism traits can cause a misdiagnosis, like autism overlaps ADHD a lot, some have self-diagnosed themselves as autistic when the truth is they’re symptoms of ADHD.

    Try and avoid stereotypes, I didn’t have a speech delay, I’ve never struggled with eye contact, I’m not hypersensitive to light, sound etc… and I have an official diagnosis of autism, I were diagnosed in 1996.