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Imposter syndrome

Sassenach

My GP has agreed to refer me for diagnosis. I assume I will be sent forms and questionnaires to fill out at some point

So now imposter syndrome has set in. Am I really autistic? What if I just have extreme anxiety? What if I just have mild OCD? So what if I like rituals, prefer working from home, don't mix with friends, just my family, can't bear sudden or loud noises, the sound of people eating, can hear a pin drop in the next street. Surely everyone can smell everything acutely? most clothes are annoying aren't they, is it really significant that I only wear the same soft things over and over and most of the tags are cut out? the hand flapping I thought I kept hidden that shows up on my security cameras, the meltdown after a sensory overload...sigh.

AQ10 =10

AQ50 = 40

RAADs = 166

CAT-Q:131

RBQ-2A = 49

I just have to be happy now that at least I am one step further down the line. Does an official diagnosis give peace of mind that at least there is a reason for struggling in life? maybe it does. I'm willing to wait for it. 

  • I have never hand-flapped or rocked in my life. I scored 9 on AQ10, 37 on AQ50 and 167 on RAADS-R. Fifteen minutes into my autism assessment I was told that I would be diagnosed with ASD. It is quite normal to feel some level of imposter syndrome; it doesn't mean that you are not autistic, just that you over-think things - an autistic trait in itself.

  • I cam relate to Your question 100% imposter syndrome  and all!! It didn't help that after I had filled in the initial questionnaire and I got call back to tell me I would be referred, he asked me why I want the assessment?! It kind of threw me I started stuttering couldn't get my words out I eventually said because I think maybe on the autistic spectrum,  he then proceeds to say a diagnosis won't change anything I was gobsmacked I didn't know what to say other than oh....when I came of the phone which was roughly 4pm today I cried and feel like crap and feel like I'm making it all up!!! I'm just so tired of struggling through life like this and a diagnosis may open opportunities for help, and it will give me that understanding of why I've always felt the way I have the meltdowns after too much social interaction or the school run ect!!!

  • in reply to Luftmentsch

    Thank you for sharing, I have felt similar - useless at life feelings. I have struggled with mental health issues too so always put it down to those but I am now awaiting a diagnosis. I have scored highly on all the questionaire things but I am worried I am just clinging to a label.... It is good to know that a diagnosis can give peace of mind.

  • I spent a long time worrying that I was not "really autistic" and that I was really just "useless at life," not least because I was initially misdiagnosed as neurotypical and had to fight to get reassessed years later.  I didn't really completely believe I was on the spectrum until I got the official diagnosis.  And, yes, finally getting it did give me a lot of peace of mind.  Good luck!

  • Hiya, I feel exactly the same! I've done the questionnaires that the GP sent and now I'm just awaiting an assessment. 

    It never occurred to me that I might be autistic, it was a recommendation that came out of the blue from a Dyspraxia assessment that I had through Lexxic.

    Now I have all of these conflicting thoughts about it. Because my traits are so subtle and I've learned to work around my difficulties, I keep thinking am I autistic or just introverted? I keep feeling like getting an assessment is maybe a bit dramatic. 

  • I think whatever you find out about yourself will go to helping you sort out your struggles in life. You will know which angle to approach them from. I never like it when people say "just" anxiety as this can be crippling for some people whether they are on the spectrum or not! (I'm saying this kindly - not having a pop).

  • The worries that you have now are understandable - but they are worries. The worry you have today will not be the worry you have tomorrow. (I say this, but I am aware this is something that I also have difficulty with.)

    Sassenach said:
    Does an official diagnosis give peace of mind that at least there is a reason for struggling in life?

    This is great news. Fingers crossed for you.

    Sassenach said:
    Does an official diagnosis give peace of mind that at least there is a reason for struggling in life?

    If you find out you are really autistic, you find out you are really autistic. If you find out it is just extreme anxiety, you find out you have extreme anxiety... The more you know - and the more specifics you know - the better you will know yourself

    Sassenach said:
    Does an official diagnosis give peace of mind that at least there is a reason for struggling in life? maybe

    For me, it took a while (a very long while) to come to terms with the implications of the diagnosis. But it helped.

    Best of luck.