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Autistic parent? Please help

NAS76162

I'm 35 years old. My mother is nearly 70. The last few years I've started to suspect she might be autistic. Most places online seem to offer support to parents of children with autism but what about info/ support for those whose parents are autistic? Does anyone know of any books or other info to read?

I've spent my whole life looking after my mum. Her marriage didn't work. She has no friends. I'm the only one she has. It's too much sometimes. I have a baby now and I'm exhausted and finding it even more difficult to interact with her. She just can't see my point of view on anything. Won't meet me half way for anything. I'm struggling more than ever to be understanding with her. Is there anyone else out there who has grown up supporting an autistic parent? It would just be so good to talk to someone who has. None of my friends have ever been able to relate to the experience I've had growing up with my mum. 

Thank you in advance. 

Parents

  • Well, my dad died before I even started on my autism journey but my elderly mum went through my diagnostic process with me and, over time, I gradually shared more information with her about autism.  Only snippets here and there, information and my own thoughts and nothing that I thought would lead to her towards feeling defensive.  

    in the last few years of her life, we shared quite a lot of information, including the positives, and she eventually suggested that she might be autistic too.  It sort of had to come from  her but I think that taking it gradually really helped.  Otherwise there'd be a danger of the other person digging their heels in.

    I had the same experience as you in that there's little information about for older autistic people, but what I did find was that when I went to autistic-led sites for info (books and webinars) there was actually quite a lot that could be applied across the lifespan.  I do think things need to change, though, and include much more specifically for older people.   

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  • Well, my dad died before I even started on my autism journey but my elderly mum went through my diagnostic process with me and, over time, I gradually shared more information with her about autism.  Only snippets here and there, information and my own thoughts and nothing that I thought would lead to her towards feeling defensive.  

    in the last few years of her life, we shared quite a lot of information, including the positives, and she eventually suggested that she might be autistic too.  It sort of had to come from  her but I think that taking it gradually really helped.  Otherwise there'd be a danger of the other person digging their heels in.

    I had the same experience as you in that there's little information about for older autistic people, but what I did find was that when I went to autistic-led sites for info (books and webinars) there was actually quite a lot that could be applied across the lifespan.  I do think things need to change, though, and include much more specifically for older people.   

Children
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