Hi all,
I'm a 51 year-old man, diagnosed with ASD about a year ago. Makes sense in a lot of ways, but I am struggling to know who I am now.
That's maybe for another day.
Anyway, I am in a pattern now that is destructive and risky.
Sometimes, I make my wife cross/ upset, and then I get very upset very quickly in the argument. This then spirals down into a very dark place, complete with worthlessness and suicidal thoughts. I have done some mild self-harming in this state, but have not yet attempted suicide.
I do suffer from anxiety and mild depression, mostly controlled by Citalopram (40mg per day).
It feels like it's a meltdown with a very specific pattern. I do have meltdowns at other times, but those aren't usually too bad, and I am usually fine after a while given some time and peace and quiet.
I have been seeking help for a number of years, and have been passed between the ASD service and several other teams at my local MH trust, but I don't fit anyone's criteria, and the adult ASD service doesn't have any therapeutic offerings.
Any thoughts would be very welcome!
