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ASD diagnosis (reactions from those around you)

RuthTaylor

Hello All,

I got diagnosed with Aspergers earlier this month and have been surprised by people's reactions to my diagnosis (not that I've told a lot of people but close friends, family, employer and a few medical professionals) and these are the responses that I've had:

  • You don't look autistic
  • Oh no I'm sorry to hear that
  • You don't act autistic
  • Don't people get diagnosed as children (A Pharmacist said this)
  • You seem normal to me
  • Oh but you're intelligent (My dad)
  • Is that a learning disability (My dad)
  • I've never seen you being violent or screaming

Just wondered what responses you got from those around you when you told them that you were diagnosed with ASD?

Thanks 

Ruth 

Parents

  • My family have been supportive. The only person who has been difficult about it—is me. I still have moments where I don't accept it. One thing I will say is that if you're expecting people to care about your diagnosis, then you'll be disappointed.  They may consider it in a fleeting moment, but, while it is important to us, it's not usually important to anyone else. At best, I think all we can hope for is a reaction of mild curiosity or indifference.

  • in reply to ☕Tassimo ☕
    ☕Tassimo ☕ said:
    One thing I will say is that if you're expecting people to care about your diagnosis, then you'll be disappointed.  They may consider it in a fleeting moment, but, while it is important to us, it's not usually important to anyone else.

    Yeah, my expectations were too high. I'd been struggling for a long time and personal communication was getting harder and harder, I couldn't stay in a job properly and was starting to break completely - which is why I finally pursued the diagnosis.

    I thought that my parents, close family and close friends (all of whom I've known for 20+ years) would be more responsive. I'd confided in close friends. I didn't expect people to be fawning over me, but I was hoping that they might be supportive and able to engage a bit about it as I was trying to understand and relate to past issues. I thought they might say "ah, that's why you do this" and maybe be more understanding about certain things.

    That said, I do completely get and understanding your point.

  • in reply to StayingAnon

    SA, you may be one of the fortunate people who have a close family/support network in which everyone is super interested in each other. I know these relationships do exist (and not just in the movies). I've not seen this  play out in my experience (up to an including my own diagnosis). The default position for most people is, as I say, is usually at best mild curiosity or indifference. People, despite what we may think, have far less interest in us than we imagine. Occasionally, I've experienced resentment or disbelief from certain people, but those were few in comparison with the reactions of vague curiosity or dis-interest.

  • in reply to ☕Tassimo ☕
    ☕Tassimo ☕ said:
    you may be one of the fortunate people who have a close family/support network in which everyone is super interested in each other

    I think I am Grinning and in everything else they are.

    But still, when it came to support and understanding in my diagnosis, lots was lacking. I needed it to help me accept the diagnosis and to align the past with this new information. I think with more support I could move on easier. We're close, but aside from my daughters, I'm reconciling everything by myself.

    But, still not disagreeing with your points.

Reply
  • in reply to ☕Tassimo ☕
    ☕Tassimo ☕ said:
    you may be one of the fortunate people who have a close family/support network in which everyone is super interested in each other

    I think I am Grinning and in everything else they are.

    But still, when it came to support and understanding in my diagnosis, lots was lacking. I needed it to help me accept the diagnosis and to align the past with this new information. I think with more support I could move on easier. We're close, but aside from my daughters, I'm reconciling everything by myself.

    But, still not disagreeing with your points.

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