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It's Not Cool To be Autistic

NAS61891

I've heard over the years people who claim to be autistic saying that they like their autism, and that there's a certain coolness about being an "Aspie."  It holds advantages over being neurotypical.  They wouldn't swap.  It's almost a boast.  I've never understood this. 

I'm on the spectrum and diagnosed as high-functioning.  I hold down a decent job, and have done so for many years.  However, I've seen my colleagues be promoted past me and had to accept the situation because of my social interaction and communication challenges.  Work has never been easy, and every day has been a challenge, and I long for retirement, when I won't have to interact with people.  When I reflect back on my life and recall the missed opportunities in terms of personal relationships, and friendships, the unhappiness at attending what should be fun social events, the meltdowns, the stimming; how can anyone want this situation?

I've now recently learnt that my grandson is autistic, not high-functioning and probably non-verbal.  It will be a challenge for him for the rest of his life, and for those who care for him.  I also now have a further issue to deal with in that I can't help thinking that I'm possibly the reason he's autistic.

In no way, shape or form is it, or could it ever be cool.  

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  • I don't want to swap my life for being a neurotypical, because they just seem weird to me, and I don't understand why they value the things they do. Like why is small talk even a thing? There's a million more interesting things to talk about. 

    And if a neurotypical person gets promoted by a neurotypical boss to do neurotypical work, that does not surprise me much that they got promoted. I don't wish to wait for a neurotypical to approve of my communication skills, and to me, they communicate a lot more than I'd ever wish to hear, because my ears are sensitive to loud and talkative people. 

    I mean what social events are fun for everyone? Neurotypicals can have all sorts of drama that occur at parties, like breakups, friends against friends, drunken embarrassing moments, the fight over the last slice of cake, where is the baby, and the list goes on. I just find it tedious to have to get dressed, go for a few hours to do nothing, then go home and take all the nice things off, when I could have been doing nothing at home in the first place, that saves a lot of time and effort. 

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  • I don't want to swap my life for being a neurotypical, because they just seem weird to me, and I don't understand why they value the things they do. Like why is small talk even a thing? There's a million more interesting things to talk about. 

    And if a neurotypical person gets promoted by a neurotypical boss to do neurotypical work, that does not surprise me much that they got promoted. I don't wish to wait for a neurotypical to approve of my communication skills, and to me, they communicate a lot more than I'd ever wish to hear, because my ears are sensitive to loud and talkative people. 

    I mean what social events are fun for everyone? Neurotypicals can have all sorts of drama that occur at parties, like breakups, friends against friends, drunken embarrassing moments, the fight over the last slice of cake, where is the baby, and the list goes on. I just find it tedious to have to get dressed, go for a few hours to do nothing, then go home and take all the nice things off, when I could have been doing nothing at home in the first place, that saves a lot of time and effort. 

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