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Language and telling people you are Autistic

LongSpoons

In the next few months discussing our family's Autism is going to become a big thing, there seems to be a lot of opinions on what is and isn't appropriate language and there are even some cute examples where people have tried to repurpose abbreviations like using difference instead of disorder for ASD.

Given all the confusion I'm thinking of using having an "Autistic Profile" then detailing which aspects apply and what that means. 

I'm hoping that taking this approach will allow me to retain credibility and some control over the flow of information.

I'm also hoping taking this approach will allow me to define a framework of reasonable adjustments.

Has anyone looked at the language they use to communicate their Autism and their needs?

  • in reply to BJS

    i had it as a pdf file. U cant attach a pdf file to a reply ! I had to  find the original link which was a pain Disappointed

  • in reply to BJS

    Yeah, I've written one of those letters but it seemed too much sharing.

    I need a way to describe my autism that I can also use to talk to my son about his autism and how my challenges are different to his. We also need to manage his expectations and congratulate how he is making progress in developing his coping strategies. 

    Work colleagues aren't really a big issue, I own the company and I employ people who fit well in our team. Clients and stakeholders are a different story so the issue of credibility and control become much more important. 

    The spectrum concept seems to invite people to judge how autistic they feel you are, I'm at the higher functioning end so the fear is that it just don't accept it, the same applies to my son where it only seems apparent when he has a melt down. 

    I like the menu approach that an "Autistic Profile" gives, it compartmentalises different aspects and can be used to explain specific aspects when it is necessary, so for example "I have a misbalance between cognitive processing and working memory this means that it is likely that a different solution will occur to me later on as I process all the information" or "I have a misbalance between cognitive processing and working memory this means that I will learn more effectively working through how something occurs rather than learning by rote". 

    I don't mean to be dismissive but big letter seems to be bad NT and I can do bad NT without sharing anything.

  • someone posted this a while back, it is a letter they were intending to send to their work colleagues

    "One last thing. Since we’re going to be working together closely, I thought I’d just give you a few tips on working with me (and my version of autism/aspergers… everyone is different!) that might help you and stop you feeling frustrated.
    Be direct. I don’t pick up on social cues very well and can be very poor at reading between the lines (at least when speaking… I’m much better in writing!) Don’t expect me to understand something that you haven’t explicitly said.
    If I’m talking too much (almost always!) or being irrelevant, just attract my attention, make clear that you have something to say (or want to move on), and I will make sure to stop talking and listen.
    It sometimes takes me a while to process information. If we’re having a disagreement, this may come across as me not listening or ignoring a point you have made. The truth is, I do listen and I do change my mind, it just may take several minutes (or longer).
    I don’t mind being overruled, but what really makes me anxious is when people are personally offended that I disagreed with them in the first place. I won’t hold a grudge, but I also need to know that you won’t.
    One of the things that people find most frustrating about me is that I find it hard to trust things I don’t understand. Some people take this as disrespect: that I don’t trust them enough to just believe them. It really isn’t that. It’s just that my brain can’t use information I don’t sufficiently understand. That means I may need you to explain something that I find counter-intuitive a few times until I “get it”, which can be annoying. On the plus side, with things I do get, I can take the point and move forward very quickly.
    The main thing is just to know that, even when I am being a pain in the ass (!) it’s out of concern for the project, the organisation, and the community."