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Coming to terms with realising you are probably autistic

Ultramarine

Hi,

Sorry I've been posting on here such a lot recently.  I was just wondering if anyone can relate to this.

Did you find it hard to come to terms with, when you first realised you might be autistic?  I haven't yet been diagnosed, but I'm becoming more and more sure that I am autistic, the more I find out about autism and recognise the signs in myself.

I'm finding that it's very hard for me to concentrate on work at the moment, and I'm just feeling upset, tense and unsettled.  Also really anxious.

I don't know if this is normal or if anyone else experienced this when you were at a similar stage?

I don't know if I should try to fight it and carry on as normal, or give myself a bit of slack and try to rest a bit more when I can.

Parents

  • Hi Ultramarine,

    I relate to this so much. I feel exactly the same. I'm not sure if my life struggles are down to autism or something else, but since I realised it could be, I haven't been able to settle my brain. I'm obsessed with it. Work is difficult, I find people's instructions or information is too vague and I just don't understand what people are trying to convey. I get extremely stressed out and can't understand why people do or say things as it doesn't align with my own thinking. If that makes sense. I feel like I'm just being a really awkward person all the time. 

    I can't bring myself to talk to work about what's going on with me as I feel stupid in case it turns out it's not ASD at all!

    Anyway, you are not alone. I definitely think you need to give yourself a break and do what you need to do.

    Hope you're ok :) 

Reply

  • Hi Ultramarine,

    I relate to this so much. I feel exactly the same. I'm not sure if my life struggles are down to autism or something else, but since I realised it could be, I haven't been able to settle my brain. I'm obsessed with it. Work is difficult, I find people's instructions or information is too vague and I just don't understand what people are trying to convey. I get extremely stressed out and can't understand why people do or say things as it doesn't align with my own thinking. If that makes sense. I feel like I'm just being a really awkward person all the time. 

    I can't bring myself to talk to work about what's going on with me as I feel stupid in case it turns out it's not ASD at all!

    Anyway, you are not alone. I definitely think you need to give yourself a break and do what you need to do.

    Hope you're ok :) 

Children
  • in reply to Seren fach

    Hello Seren,

    I'm really glad that you've started posting.  Welcome to this forum.  I hope that you will find it helpful to be part of the community.

    Thanks for your reply to my post.  I wonder whether perhaps, since you've become aware that you could be autistic, it's helped you to notice difficulties which you perhaps had before, but maybe learning about autism has just made you more aware of them.

    I can relate to what you say, about being reluctant to tell people about it until you are sure that you are autistic.  Are you intending to have an assessment and if so, do you know how long you have to wait?

    Thanks for your kind words.  I am finding it difficult at the moment.  I can't focus as easily on work; in fact, the work that I do doesn't seem as important or interesting to me as it once did.  The life that I'd carefully constructed, where I buried myself in work and didn't interact with people much, now seems inadequate to me, and I feel very lonely and long for more companionship and relationships, but I find relationships difficult.